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UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. 



LIFE AND JOURNAL 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 



WORKS OF REV. E. DAVIES 



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HOLINESS BOOK CONCERN, Reading, Mass. 



r • • * 

LIFE AND JOURNAL 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 



(EontiensetJ artti (EomfrinetJ 



By Rev. E. DAVIES, Evangelist, 

AUTHOR OF "THE GIFT OF THE HOLY GHOST," "THE BELIEVER'S 
HANDBOOK," " THE BOY-PREACHER," ETC. 







PUBLISHED BY THE 

HOLINESS BOOK CONCERN, READING, MASS. 

For sale by McDonald & Gill, and J. P. Magee, Boston, Mass. ; 

Phillips & Hunt, Broadway, New York; Walden & Stowe, Cincinnati 

and Chicago; J. S. Inskip, 921 Arch St., Phila., Pa. 



jOr CONO«E$»[ 
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Copyright, 1SS2, 
By E. DAVIES. 



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Boston Stereotype Foundry, 
4 Pearl Street. 



TO 

ALL WHO LOVE THE BLESSED DOCTRINE AND EXPERIENCE 
OF 

ENTIRE SANCTIFICATION, 

AND TO ALL THOSE WHO ARE PANTING AFTER 
HEART PURITY, 

3fe tfjis Uolume 3fogpectfullg ©rtjicafstr 

BY THE AUTHOR. 



PREFACE. 



In my early religious experience I was 
greatly blest in reading the Memoirs and 
Journal of Mrs. Hester Ann Rogers, and 
have always cherished her memory as among 
my chief est treasures. Of late I have read 
them again, with much care and profit. And, 
as there is much repetition in these books, 
and much local matter that is not of interest 
in our day, and which is not essential to a 
graphic and thrilling account of this lady's 
glorious life and death, and as it is difficult 
and somewhat expensive to purchase and read 
two books about one lady, I have . condensed 
and combined the two books into one, and 
have decided to publish it in a cheap form 
for the present generation, so that all con- 
cerned can get it and read it, with a saving 
of both time and money. 

As there is a wide-spread interest on this 
subject of entire sanctification, and multitudes 
are asking for light and experience, I hope to 
supply a felt need, and to do my part in dif- 



Vlll PREFACE. 

fusing light and knowledge on this glorious 
theme of Bible holiness. In publishing this 
book, I would add my influence in favor of 
the standard doctrine and experience of holi- 
ness, as taught in the days of Wesley and 
Fletcher, when true Christians were as radi- 
cally convicted of the need of entire sanctifi- 
cation as they had been of their need of 
pardon or regeneration, and when they were 
as radically sanctified as they were converted. 
This was the case with Mrs. Rogers. And 
especially that the younger portion of the 
Christian community may have a cheap and 
yet comprehensive account of the life y journal 
and death of one of the most devout women 
of the eighteenth century. 

Mrs. Rogers' connection with Mr. Wesley 
and with the Methodism of those times will 
make this book both interesting and profit- 
able. I have endeavored to make it as brief 
and yet as thrilling in interest as possible. If 
the many readers are half as much blest in 
perusing these pages as I have been in writ- 
ing them, I shall be amply paid " in the 
morning of the resurrection." 

Reading, Mass., 1882. 



CONTENTS. 



CHAPTER I. 



Birth and early life. — Father's death. — Deep sorrow. — Is 

allowed to dance. — Sin predominates Page n 

CHAPTER II. 

Peculiar dislike to the Methodists. — Convicted of sin — Re- 
sists the Spirit. — Breaks solemn vows. — Conviction 
deepens. — Destroys her fine clothes. — Mother thinks 
she is losing her senses. — Converted at the Sacramental 
Service. — Much opposition. — The Lord bears the bur- 
den. — Becomes a servant in the family. — Is very sick. 
— Life spared. — Letter to a lady of rank 21 

CHAPTER III. 

Conflict with inbred sin. — A mystery to herself. — Panting 

after God and holiness. — Deep communion with God . 39 

CHAPTER IV. 

Seeking entire sanctification. — Strange hardness of heart. — 
Looking to God for the baptism. — Is mightily sancti- 
fied to God, and walks in unclouded light. — Joy un- 
speakable and full of glory. — Outward trials. — Meets 
Mr. Wesley 46 

CHAPTER V. 

Great bodily weakness. — Seraphic fervor of spirit. — Sleep- 
less for joy. — Overwhelmed with the divine presence. — 
Longing for immortality. — Body overpowered. — 
Mother healed in answer to prayer 57 



X CONTENTS. 

CHAPTER VI. 
Her communion with God, Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. — 

Most intimate fellowship maintained for twenty years . 66 

CHAPTER VII. 
Her connection with John Wesley. — He treated her with 
fatherly care. — Mr. Wesley's sermons. — Thrilling in- 
terview with John Fletcher. — Mr. Fletcher's experience 
of deadness to sin. — Thrilling testimony. — How he 
lost the blessing. — Mrs. Rogers a class teacher .... 76 

CHAPTER VIII. 
Some of her spiritual letters 92 

CHAPTER IX. 
Her acquaintance with Mr. Rogers' family. — Death of Mrs. 
Rogers. — Is married to Mr. Rogers. — Labors in Dub- 
lin. — Trials and triumphs. — Letters from Mr. Wesley. 

— Appointed to London. — Five months with Mr. Wesley. 

— His most glorious and triumphant death. — Mrs. Rogers 
tried and purified in the fire. — Mrs. Rogers in heaviness. 

— Full salvation saves. — Resting at Spitalfields . . . 117 

CHAPTER X. 
Little Mary healed in answer to prayer. — Dear to God. — 

Terrible death of a young lady 127 

CHAPTER XI. 

Blissful experience. — Latter day glory. — Pathetic and vic- 
torious death. — Maternal ties. — Dying testimony. — 
The Lord prepared her for it. — Mr. Rogers' experience 
under the trial 134 

CHAPTER XII. 
More of her spiritual letters 141 



LIFE AND JOURNAL 

OF 

MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 



CHAPTER I. 

BIRTH AND EARLY LIFE. 

In the starry vault of heaven there are but 
few stars of the first magnitude. So it is in 
the starry vault of Christian experience, for as 
one star differeth from another star in glory, 
so among the saints of God there is a great 
variety, and but few are found of the first mag- 
nitude in glory. Among these precious few 
we may name Mrs. Hester Ann Rogers, whose 
memory is blessed, and whose name is as 
fragrant as ointment poured forth. 

Mrs. Hester Ann Rogers was born at Mac- 
clesfield, England, Jan. 31, 1756. Her father, 
Rev. Mr. Roe, was a clergyman of the church 
of England. He gave this daughter an excel- 
lent education, and instructed her in the prin- 
ciples of piety. She was not allowed to name 



12 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

God but with the deepest reverence. Once, 
for telling a lie, she was rebuked in a manner 
that she never forgot. She says : — 

I was early drawn out to secret prayer ; I 
believed God was the author of all good, of all 
happiness ; and sin the cause of all misery and 
pain. If therefore I wished for anything I had 
not, I asked God in secret to grant it to me. 
And in any pain of body, or in any of my child- 
ish grief, I fled to him for ease and comfort ; 
and it would be incredible to some, how often 
I have received manifest answers to prayer, 
when not more than four years old ; and how 
my tender mind has been comforted. I was 
deeply affected, and had very serious thoughts 
of death for some time, and after seeing the 
corpse of a little brother of mine, who died of 
the small pox when I was five years old, I 
took great delight in the Bible, and could at 
this time read any part either of the Old or 
New Testament, always asking questions so as 
to obtain understanding of what I read. My 
parents required that I should give an account 
every Sabbath evening of the sermons and les- 
sons I heard at church, and say my catechism 
to them, which they explained to my under- 
standing. They also required that I should 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 3 

learn the collect for the day, and repeat it with 
my other prayers every night and morning. 
These collects I also often repeated in secret, 
and with great sincerity before the Lord. I do 
not remember ever going to bed without having 
said my prayers, except once : I was then 
diverted by a girl who told me many childish 
stories, and so took up my attention, that I 
forgot to pray till I was in bed ; and then being 
alone, I recollected what I had done, and con- 
science greatly accused me ; so that I began 
to tremble lest Satan should be permitted of 
God to take me away body and soul, which I 
felt I deserved ! I soon after thought I saw 
him coming to the side of my bed ; when I 
shrieked out in such a manner as brought my 
parents up stairs to see what was the matter. 
This made a lasting impression ; and I never 
after dared to neglect commending myself to 
the protection of God before I slept. I was at 
this time about six years old. 

When about eight years of age I heard my 
father say he had a very remarkable dream 
when recovering from a dangerous illness ; 
that he stood before the throne of God, and 
saw his glory, but not being able to gaze upon 
it, fell on his face in raptures of joy. 



14 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

My mother asked if he could describe what 
he saw, but he answered, No, it was impossible 
to convey any idea of it, the sight seemed al- 
most to deprive him of being. She asked if 
anything was spoken to him, but he desired 
her to ask no more respecting it : nor would he 
ever tell her any more. I have often thought 
he received some notice in that dream of his 
approaching dissolution. A material change 
was evident from that time in all his conduct 
and tempers. Anger was ever before a beset- 
ting sin, but I do not remember to have seen 
him overcome by it after this. He was more 
vigilant in public and private duties ; more 
humble and patient under little difficulties and 
trials, more watchful over the morals of all 
around him, and took more pains than ever to 
inform my infant mind in all things which led 
to piety and virtue. He warned me against 
reading novels and romances, would not suffer 
me to learn to dance, nor to go on visits to play 
with those of my own age. He said it was the 
ruin of youth to suppose they were only to 
spend their time in diversions. I believe I 
shall have reason to bless God forever for 
several lessons he then gave me, and to all of 
which I listened with great delight. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 5 

In February, 1765, when I was a little more 
than nine years old, he took his last sickness ; 
a malignant fever, in which he lay several 
weeks, expressing through the whole of it an 
entire submission to the will of God, and an 
assurance of a happy eternity. He sung 
psalms, repeated various scriptures and praised 
God aloud ; and was continually commending 
to his care his dear wife and children. A few 
days before he died, he called aloud for me ; 
and "when I came, he took my hand in his, very 
affectionately, and said, " My dear Hetty, you 
look dejected. You must not let your spirits 
be cast down ; God hath ever cared for me, and 
he will take care of mine. He will bless you, 
my dear, when I am gone. I hope you will be 
a good child, and then you will be happy/' 
Then laying his hand on my head, he lifted his 
eyes to heaven, and with a solemnity I shall 
never forget, said, — " Unto God's gracious 
mercy and protection I commit thee : the Lord 
bless thee, and keep thee ; the Lord lift up the 
light of his countenance upon thee, and give 
thee peace, and make thee his child and faith- 
ful servant to thy life's end ! " I cannot find 
words to express what were the feelings of my 
heart on this occasion. Love for my valuable 



1 6 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

and affectionate parent ; grief to reflect I was 
now losing him, and gratitude that his dying 
lips had pronounced such a blessing on my 
head, quite overpowered me. I fell on my 
knees, gave vent to my feelings in a flood of 
tears, and continued to weep till my eyes were 
almost swelled up. He died the ioth of April, 
1765. 

My grief for some time would not suffer me 
to take recreations of any kind ; but I would sit 
and read to my mother, or weep with her. But 
after a season, I was invited to the houses of 
relations and friends ; and as I soon became a 
laughing-stock among them for my seriousness, 
and dislike to their manners and their plays, I 
began to be ashamed of being so particular. 
My mother was also now prevailed on to let me 
learn to dance, in order to raise my spirits and 
improve my carriage, etc. This was a fatal 
stab to my seriousness and divine impressions ; 
it paved the way to lightness, trifling, love of 
pleasure, and various evils. As I soon made 
some proficiency, I delighted much in this en- 
snaring folly. My pride was fed by being ad- 
mired, and began to make itself manifest with 
all its fruits. I now aimed to excel my com- 
panions, not in piety, but in fashionable dress ; 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. \J 

and could not rest long without being engaged 
in parties of pleasure, and especially in this 
(what the world calls) innocent amusement. I 
also obtained all the novels and romances I 
possibly could, and spent some time every day 
in reading them ; though at first it was unknown 
to my mother, who would not then suffer it. 
After this I attended plays also. In short, I 
fell into all the vain customs and pleasures of a 
delusive world, as far as my situation in life 
would admit, and even beyond the proper limits 
of that station in which God had placed me. 
Thus was my precious time misspent, and my 
foolish heart wandered far from happiness and 
God ; urging me on to endless ruin. Yet in all 
this, I was not left without keen convictions, 
gentle drawings, and many short-lived good 
resolutions, especially till fifteen years of age. 
God often wrought strongly upon my mind, and 
that in various ways, of which I come now to 
speak. But O ! how did I grieve and resist 
the Holy Ghost ! How justly might he have 
given me up ; yea, and sealed me over to eter- 
nal destruction ! 

At the age of thirteen she was confirmed 
by the Bishop of Chester, and then felt a 
greater responsibility to keep God's com- 



1 8 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

mandments. At the end of this year she 
came near the gates of death by a malignant 
fever. She was totally unprepared to meet 
God. She vowed to God that if he would 
spare her life she would lead a new life. God 
spared the barren fig-tree, and she was re- 
stored to health. 

About this time she dreamed that she and 
her three cousins were dead and summoned 
to the bar of God. Her sins all appeared in 
array before her, and she felt that she deserved 
the sentence of God to endless misery. Then 
a bright angel appeared, in white, and stood 
before them. They expected he would sen- 
tence them to hell, but instead of this he 
smiled upon them and said, "The Lord Jesus 
has forgiven your sins and washed you in his 
own blood, and I am come to bid you enter 
into the joy of your Lord, and conduct you 
into his blissful presence. ,, At this, rapturous 
joy filled her soul, and she sprung up and 
clapped her hands, and leaped for joy, and 
praised God in ecstasies of joy she had never 
known before. 

She never forgot this dream. For a while 
she was quite serious, and read all the reli- 
gious books she could get hold of. Finding 






MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. ig 

that she was to be judged according to her 
works, she bought a little book and kept a 
record of all her good and all her bad actions, 
and although she would sometimes fast all 
day that she might swell up her good works, 
still her evil works excelled the good. 

She still visited the ball-room, and one 
night she pulled out this little book with her 
pocket handkerchief. Her companions picked 
it up and found out what it was, and began 
to ridicule her, and this was the end of that 
effort to be good. 

She had a great taste for reading, from her 
youth ; till she was converted she would read 
novels and romances. She would sometimes 
read three or four hundred octavo pages in a 
day. After she was converted, she took 
great delight in studying her Bible, and also 
Rollin's Ancient History. She had a critical 
knowledge of the English language, and her 
extensive reading made her capable of con- 
versing upon almost any subject, whether of 
an historical, philosophical or theological 
nature. Writing seemed to be her peculiar 
talent. She took great delight therein, from 
her youth. She tried to conquer her sins 
one at a time, but — 



20 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

" The more she strove against their power, 
She felt their weight and guilt the more." 

Still she fell into sin and condemnation. 
She says : " It was some time, however, 
before I had so resisted the convictions of the 
Holy Spirit as to remain at ease : he strove 
with me in various ways, till I was a little 
more than fifteen. But I so repeatedly grieved 
and quenched the motions of that Holy Spirit, 
that I was then in some measure given up to 
my own foolish rebellious heart. Dress, novels, 
plays, cards, assemblies, and balls, took up the 
most of my time, so that my mother began to 
fear the consequences of my living so much 
above my station in life. But I would not now 
listen to her admonitions. I loved pleasures, 
and after them I would go." 

She says again : " I found that pride was 
interwoven with every thought, and word, and 
action." 

Her godmother who stood sponsor for her 
when she was baptized, was a wealthy lady, 
and made her large presents, and treated her as 
though she intended to bestow upon her a 
handsome fortune. This tended to foster her 
pride, and thus she spent the days of her 
youth. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 21 



CHAPTER II. 

HER CONVERSION TO GOD AND EARLY CHRIS- 
TIAN EXPERIENCE. 

She had a peculiar dislike to the Method- 
ists. From all the reports she had heard of 
them she was greatly prejudiced against 
them, and thought their ministers were like 
the Catholic priests. At length Rev. David 
Simpson, a Methodist minister, began to labor 
in her native town, and to preach against all 
her favorite sins. She was fully determined 
that she would not give up her sins and be 
converted among the Methodists. Just about 
this time one of her associates died suddenly 
from a cold she took at an assembly. This 
made a deep impression upon her. Yet, she 
was determined she would not be converted 
among the Methodists. The Holy Spirit 
strove with her mightily, and asked her if she 
would be willing to be struck dead upon the 
ball-room floor. She stifled convictions with 



22 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

all her might, and ran more eagerly after 
pleasure. 

Still Mr. Simpson's (the Methodist minister) 
sermons began to sink deeper into her heart. 
Sometimes she came out of the church weep- 
ing, and at times resolved to forsake her sins, 
and many times she broke her promises. At 
length she became satisfied that she must 
be born of the Spirit or be forever lost. Yet 
with a bleeding conscience she would still go 
on in sin, till at length she found that she had 
violated every command of the decalogue. 
She had broken her baptismal vow and her 
confirmation vow, and her sacramental vows, 
and felt that she had no title to any mercy or 
any hope. Deeply convicted she went home, 
and ran up stairs, and fell upon her knees, 
and made a solemn vow to renounce and for- 
sake all sinful pleasures and trifling com- 
panions. She arose the next morning, and, 
without telling her mother, she took all her 
finery and high-dressed caps, and ripped them 
all up, so that she could wear them no more. 
She cut her hair short and vowed she would 
never dance again. She bewailed her own 
sinfulness, and cried for mercy. She could 
neither eat, or sleep, or take comfort. All 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 23 

the curses of the Bible seemed to be pointing 
at her, and she could not claim a single prom- 
ise. Her whole life seemed nothing but sin 
and rebellion against her Creator, Redeemer, 
and Sanctifier. She feared that it was too 
late to seek for mercy. 

Her mother thought that she was losing 
her senses. Her friends sought in vain to 
comfort her. After a mighty struggle she 
ventured to approach the table of the Lord, 
encouraged by the words, " A broken and 
a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise." 
And as Mr. Simpson was reading that sen- 
tence in the service, " If any man sin, we 
have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus 
Christ, the righteous : and he is the propitia- 
tion for our sins," a ray of divine light and 
comfort darted into her soul, and she cried, 
" Lord Jesus ! let me feel thou art the pro- 
pitiation for my sins." Then she believed 
there was mercy for her. A love to God 
sprang up in her heart, and she began to re- 
joice in him, and the fear of death was taken 
away. She confessed this to some of her 
associates, and they made light of it, and she 
became discouraged and lost her peace. 

She went to hear Mr. Samuel Bardsley 



24 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

preach from " Comfort ye, comfort ye, my 
people." Every word went home to her heart 
as if he had known all her secret thoughts. 
She was greatly comforted, and her prejudices 
against the Methodists melted away. But her 
mother determined that if ever she found that 
her daughter had gone to hear the Methodists 
she would disown her. Every friend and re- 
lation she had were of the same kind, and she 
had no acquaintance, as yet, among the 
Methodists. Her only refuge was in God. She 
used much prayer and entreaty with God. 
When he spoke to her as follows: "Did 
ever any trust in the Lord and was con- 
founded?" she answered, " No, Lord, and I 
will trust in thee. If I perish, I will perish 
at thy feet. Only show me thy will, and 
here I am." 

The Saviour spoke to her heart and said, 
" If any man will come after me, let him deny 
himself, and take up his cross and follow me." 
She cried, " Lord, I will forsake all and follow 
thee ; I will joyfully bear thy cross, only give 
me thyself ? " 

After this she faithfully attended Methodist 
meetings, and multitudes of her former friends 
called her to account for such strange con- 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 25 

duct. But the Lord gave her a mouth and 
wisdom to plead her own cause with Bible 
arguments. She left her company many 
times a day to retire to her closet to com- 
mune with God. She refused to conform to 
the world in dress or in spirit. Earthly re- 
sources were cut off, but heavenly resources 
afforded ample supplies of comfort. Her lan- 
guage was, — 

" None but Christ to me be given, 
None but Christ in earth or heaven." 

She frankly told her mother that she must 
attend to the salvation of her soul, and begged 
her not to confine her from Methodist meet- 
ings any more, offering to be a servant in 
her house, and do all the work, if she could 
only be allowed to attend the Methodist meet- 
ing. Her mother consented, expecting that 
she would soon get weary and give it up. She 
was greatly comforted in reading John Wes- 
ley's sermon on justification by faith. She 
read it many times with prayer. She walked 
to and fro in her room, groaning after God, 
when suddenly the Lord spoke these words 
to her heart : " Believe on the Lord Jesus 
Christ, and thou shalt be saved," She said, 



26 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

" Lord, I know this is thy word, and I can de- 
pend upon it." Then this promise came to her 
relief : " Cast all thy burden upon him, for he 
careth for you." She replied : " I cast my 
soul upon thee for time and for eternity." 
She says : " Then did he appear to my salva- 
tion. In that moment my fetters were 
broken, my soul was set at liberty. The love 
of God was shed abroad in my heart, and I 
rejoiced with joy unspeakable. I felt a thou- 
sand promises all my own. I could now call 
Jesus Lord by the Holy Ghost, and the Father 
my Father. My sins were gone, my soul was 
happy. I was a new creature, and seemed 
to be in a new world. I cried out, * Thou art 
my father. O God, thou art my God ! * while 
tears of joy ran down my cheeks." 

All this serves to show that she was truly 
converted to God at this time, and this laid a 
good foundation for the work of entire sancti- 
fication which she afterwards experienced, 
and so beautifully adorned and exemplified. 

The Word of God was sweeter than honey 
or the honeycomb. She generally read it on 
her knees. Her pride was laid in the dust, 
and her soul sank into humility. Her cousin, 
Robert Roe, who was intended for a minister, 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 27 

was so convicted by this wonderful experience 
of hers, that he became alarmed for himself, 
and began to inquire how she obtained it. 
He said : " I know I am a great sinner, and 
miserable beyond expression. I would give 
all the world to obtain the favor of God you 
speak of." 

She wrote to him a letter full of instruc- 
tion, advising him to go among the Method- 
ists, and go to class meeting. . After a while 
he too could rejoice in the God of his salva- 
tion. 

Six months after Miss Roe, afterwards Mrs. 
Rogers, became a servant in the family, her 
mother was sick with a fever and expected to 
die. The daughter watched with her mother 
till she was nearly sick herself. She was 
fearfully broken down in body, and could 
hardly hope to recover. She was far gone in 
consumption. She refused to take medicine 
or anything that she thought would restore 
her to health. She was so fond of heaven 
that she desired " to depart and be with Christ 
which is far better." Her joy was inexpress- 
ible. Infinite wisdom spared this useful life, 
and her cousin convinced her that by not tak- 
ing medicine and other things to recover her 



28 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

health, she was manifesting self-will while she 
professed to do the will of God. After he left 
she fell upon her knees and cried, " Lord, per- 
fectly subdue my will." God gave her this 
promise, " Ask what ye will and it shall be 
done unto thee. ,, She resigned herself to 
the will of God to live, and labor, and suffer 
for the master and his blessed cause. 

See how she expressed herself on this sub- 
ject: "I will henceforth entirely renounce 
my own will respecting life or death ! I leave 
it fully in thy hands and to thy pleasure, to 
take me now or to spare me twenty, thirty, 
yea, forty years ; or as long as thou seest my 
life will bring glory to thee, and profit to im- 
mortal souls ; relying on thy faithful promise 
given me this day, that what ' I ask shall be 
done ; ' and accounting it a solemn covenant 
between me and thee : that whensoever thou 
seest me about to be overcome by trials, by 
temptations, or snares, so that I shall in heart 
or life depart from thee, or wound thy cause, 
that then thou wilt put in thy sickle, and 
gather me home ; yea, if even at that time I 
should be so foolish as to desire life ! — Amen 
and amen. What I felt of heaven, of God, of 
love, at that season, cannot be expressed. I 



LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 29 

had communion with my Lord, as if face to 
face ; and could henceforth choose nothing 
but his will. 

" From this day forth I speedily recovered 
strength, and in a few weeks was enabled to 
attend to my daily duties." 

She began to work for Jesus as soon as she 
was converted. She says : — 

" I could neither eat, nor sleep much for 
many days and nights. The love of God shed 
abroad in my heart was now my meat and 
drink : and the thoughts of the amazing depths 
of grace which had plucked me as a brand 
from the burning quite overcame me ! — me, 
the most obstinate offender, who had so long 
and so repeatedly resisted and grieved his Holy 
Spirit ! This love of my God and Saviour, 
so unmerited and free, overflowed my soul; 
nor had I for eight months any interruption 
to my bliss. 

* Not a cloud did arise, to darken my skies. 
Or hide for a moment my Lord from my eyes.' 

" Yet I had daily crosses to take up and 
endure, but I rejoiced in being accounted 
worthy to bear the cross for Him who died to 
purchase my peace." 



30 MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 

" O how my soul is filled with love, and my 
tongue with praise, while I reflect on the 
mercies of the year past ! At the close 
of the last year I was surrounded with many 
and various trials ; but now out of all hath 
the Lord delivered me. He hath kept me from 
the fowler's snare, and hath reserved my heart 
for himself to dwell in, my present, my eternal 
portion. I have walked through the fire and 
suffered no harm ; 

; And passing through the watery flood. 
Have hung upon the arm of God." 

"His arm hath wrought salvation from dan- 
gers which I knew not, and no weapon formed 
against me hath prospered. Every trial hath 
terminated in great good. I have been shel- 
tered from every storm, been fed with the 
riches of his love, and comforted with the 
consolations of his Spirit ; I have lived in his 
smiles, and shall be preserved to his glorious 
kingdom. 

We still quote from her journal which is 
full of revelations of her experiences. She 
says, "What I felt of heaven, of God, of love 
at that season cannot be expressed. I had 
communion with my Lord as if face to face 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 3 1 

and could henceforth choose nothing but 
his will. From this day forth I soon re- 
covered strength, and in a few weeks I could 
attend some of the means of grace." Soon 
after she was converted, in her nineteenth 
year, she wrote the following letter to a lady 
of rank and fortune who was offended because 
she had become a Methodist. This letter 
shows great insight into divine things for 
one so recently converted. 

■ Macclesfield, Nov. 12, 1775. 

Dear and honored Madam, — I beg leave 
to return you my most sincere and humble 
thanks for your kind letter and advice ; and as 
you are so kind as to express a concern on my 
account, I hope you will pardon the liberty, and 
allow me to say what is my opinion and belief, 
and on what alone I can build any hopes of 
heaven and happiness. 

Man, as he came out of the hands of the 
Creator, was perfectly holy and happy. In him 
shone all those amiable and lovely attributes 
of the Deity — goodness, truth, justice, mercy 
and love. But by disobeying the divine com- 
mand, he entailed upon himself and his whole 
posterity (for he acted as the parent or head 



32 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

of all mankind) the sure wages of sin, which is 
death — death temporal, spiritual, and eternal. 
The body of man became that day mortal ; his 
soul spiritually dead, and he was every mo- 
ment liable to death eternal. The guilt of 
Adam, and the depravity of soul which he con- 
tracted by the fall, immediately devolved upon 
his unhappy offspring. And, we are told, 
when he begat a son, it was in his own 
likeness, after his image: so that now man 
is born in sin, and under the wrath of God : 
and if he die in that state, will stand exposed 
to the sentence of eternal death, And what 
can a lost man do in this case ? Atonement 
for himself, or offering meet, he hath none to 
bring ; and to pardon sinners without a satis- 
faction would not be what is commonly 
called mercy, but it would be giving up the 
essential glories of the Godhead. What must 
be done then ? Why, God of his free grace 
and unlimited bounty, has provided a ransom, 
an all-sufficient ransom, even his well-beloved 
Son ! He who is the brightness of his 
Father's glory, and the express image of his 
person, became man to die, that man might 
live. 

All that was necessary to be done to com- 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 33 

plete our salvation consisted chiefly in these 
three things : First, a perfect obedience to 
the divine law : Secondly, an infinitely meri- 
torious satisfaction to the law and govern- 
ment of God, for the dishonor brought upon 
them by the sin of man : Thirdly, a restora- 
tion of the moral image of God to the soul, 
which image was lost by the fall of man. The 
first of these was completed by the life of our 
Redeemer ; the second by his death ; and the 
third is effected by the Holy Ghost. This 
provision (ample provision) is made for the 
salvation of man, so that God can preserve 
untainted his adorable perfections ; or, as St. 
Paul declares, he can now be just and yet 
justify and save penitent, believing man. 

That Christ suffered in the place of sinners, 
is expressed by St. Peter in these words: 
" Who, his own self, bare our sins in his own 
body on the tree." Also, Isaiah saith, " Surely 
he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sor- 
rows. He was wounded for our transgres- 
sions, he was bruised foi; our iniquities. All 
we like sheep have gone astray ; we have 
turned every one to his own way, and the 
Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all." 
St. Paul saith, " He hath made him to be sin 



34 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

for us, who knew no sin, that we might fce 
made the righteousness of God in him." 
And again, in the third chapter of the 
Romans, he saith, " there is none righteous, no, 
not one ; there is none that understandeth ; 
there is none that seeketh after God ; they 
are all gone out of the way ; they are to- 
gether become unprofitable ; there is none 
that doeth good, no, not one." Therefore, he 
adds, " By the deeds of the law there shall no 
flesh be justified in his sight. But now the 
righteousness which is without the law is 
manifest, being witnessed by the law and the 
prophets ; even the righteousness of God, 
which is by faith in Jesus Christ unto all, and 
upon all them that believe ; for there is no 
difference, for all have sinned and come short 
of the glory of God. Being justified freely 
by his grace, through the redemption that is 
in Christ Jesus : whom God hath set forth to 
be a propitiation through faith in his blood, 
to declare his righteousness for the remission 
of sins that are past, through the forbearance 
•of God: to declare, I say, at this time his 
righteousness, that he might be just, and the 
justifier of him that believeth in Jesus." 
With St. Paul, then, I would go on and ask, 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 35 

"Where is boasting then?" It is excluded. 
By what law ? Of works ? Nay, but by the 
law of faith. Therefore, we conclude, that a 
man is justified by faith, without the. deeds 
of the law. For, to him that worketh is the 
reward not reckoned of grace, but of debt ; 
but to him that worketh not, but believeth on 
him that justifieth the ungodly, his faith is 
counted for righteousness. Even as David 
also describeth the blessedness of the man 
unto whom God imputeth righteousness 
without works, saying, " Blessed are they 
whose iniquities are forgiven, and whose 
sins are covered. Blessed is the man unto 
whom the Lord will not impute sin. Abra- 
ham believed God, and it was imputed 
to him for righteousness. Now it was not 
written for his sake alone that it was imputed 
to him ; but for us also, to whom it shall be 
imputed, if we believe on him that raised up 
Jesus our Lord from the dead ; who was de- 
livered for our offences, and was raised again 
for our justification." Now, from all these, 
and many more texts of Holy Scripture which 
might be named, I believe, and am sure, that 
works are not the meritorious cause of our 
salvation, yet I believe they are absolutely 



36 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

necessary, and will follow as the sure and in- 
separable fruits of a true faith. If you will 
be kind enough to read the eleventh, twelfth, 
and thirteenth articles of the Church of Eng- 
land, they will further explain my meaning. 

But there is a third thing also necessary to 
our salvation ; which is, that the image of 
God be restored to the soul. Now, this is 
done in regeneration. Our Saviour assures us, 
" Except a man be born again, he cannot see 
the kingdom of God." And again, " Except 
ye be converted, and become as little chil- 
dren, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of 
heaven." Nor indeed are we fit for it, till 
renewed by the Spirit of God. For, were it 
possible to be admitted there, we could not 
enjoy the pure and spiritual delight of the 
saints above. Their joy consists in an entire 
freedom from all sin and corruption ; and in 
serving, adoring, praising the Father of all 
their mercies, the Son of his love, and Spirit 
of holiness. And they are so far from being 
weary of this, that they think eternity too 
short to utter all his praise ! How irksome 
would be an eternity spent in this manner, to 
a person who never had his affections spirit- 
ualized, and his will brought into a conformity 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 37 

to the will of God ? This is a change which 
must be wrought in this world : for there is 
no repentance in the grave ; as death leaves 
us, judgment will find us. Then, " He that 
is unjust shall be unjust still ; he that is filthy 
shall be filthy still ; he that is righteous shall 
be righteous still ; and he that is holy shall 
be holy still ! " The Holy Ghost is the au- 
thor of this conversion or new birth ; for no 
man hath quickened his own soul. It is 
He that must begin, carry on, and com- 
plete it. 

" Now, if any man have not the spirit of 
Christ, he is none of his. And the fruits of 
this spirit are Move, joy, peace, long-suffering, 
gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, tem- 
perance ; against such there is no law. And 
they that are Christ's, have crucified the flesh 
with its affections and lusts. If any man be 
in Christ he is a new creature : old things are 
passed away ; behold, all things are become 
new/ And Jesus Christ is made of God unto 
us ' wisdom, righteousness, sanctification, and 
redemption : that according as it is written, 
he that glorieth, let him glory in the Lord. 
God forbid that I should glory, save in the 
cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by whom the 



38 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

world is crucified unto me, and I unto the 
world.'" 

This, dear madam, is what I believe, and 
this, I think, is agreeable to the word of God, 
and to the articles and homilies of the Church 
of England ; and no schism of the Church of 
Christ. Forfeiting your love and friendship 
is a great trial ; but believe me, when I think 
of seeking salvation in any other way, it seems 
as a sword piercing my very heart ! And 
seeing my dear mother so very unhappy on 
my account, gives me more grief than I can 
express ; and the thought of my being detri- 
mental to her in worldly things, and that my 
conduct should make you less her friend, 
seems strange, and is to me very afflicting. 
But I think these things ought not to be 
urged too far, especially when the soul is 
concerned. 

I am afraid I have tired your patience, so 
will hasten to subscribe myself, honored 
madam, your most obliged and dutiful daugh- 
ter, H. A. ROE. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 39 



CHAPTER III. 

CONFLICTS WITH INBRED SIN, AND PANTING 
AFTER HEART PURITY. 

After all we have written of her convic- 
tion of sin and her conversion to God, no 
one can doubt but she was indeed a true 
Christian. She had the witness of the Spirit 
that she was a child of God, and an heir of 
heaven. The fear of death was taken away, 
and the peace of God possessed her soul, and 
the love of God was shed abroad in her heart 
by the Holy Ghost given unto her. 

Yet after all this she was a mystery to her- 
self because she found sin, inbred sin, still 
lurking in her regenerated heart. Let us 
hear her own testimony on this all important 
point. After telling that she has had a joy that 
was unspeakable, she says, I felt dissatisfied 
with myself, and all around me, and knew not 
why. It might in some measure be owing to 
the indisposition of my body, but I fear it 



40 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

was more owing to the evil of my corrupt 
heart. O when shall I be holy ? 

I have been greatly tried inwardly and out- 
wardly,though I have had some refreshing visits 
of love ; but I feel many evil tempers, much 
self-will that would not be contradicted, though 
none saw it but the Lord ; peevishness, pride, 
and unbelief greatly distressed me. My cry 
was, this evening, " Create in me a clean heart 

God, and renew a right spirit within me." 
And in private prayer I was blessed in a wonder- 
ful manner. I lay at the feet of my Lord, as 
clay in the hands of the potter, only be- 
seeching him to stamp me with his lovely 
image. 

The Lord shows me more than ever, I 
must be made holy before death : and this 
day I can say, " As the hart panteth after the 
water brook," so thirst eth my soul for the 
perfect love of God. O may I never rest till 

1 have received this blessing! Lord, I have 
in this respect been a trifler ; I have been too 
easy, too lukewarm, while thy enemies have 
had a lurking place in my heart ! O forgive 
me and help me to be more in earnest ! Those 
words were applied, while engaged in wres- 
tling prayer, " All I have is thine !" And is 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 41 

not this salvation from sin His gift ? It is, 
and shall be mine. 

" O joyful sound of gospel grace, 
Christ shall in me appear ; 
I, even I, shall see his face, 
I shall be holy here." 

Mr. Wesley's Plain Account of Christian 
Perfection was this day a greater blessing 
than before. O how very ignorant, how stupid 
have I been, respecting this great salvation ; 
and even yet I seem to know nothing". Lord, 
teach me, and save me fully. I find while 
pressing after entire purity, my communion 
with God increases, and I have more power 
to do his will. 

I awoke several times in the night, praying 
for sanctificatidn. O the depth of unbelief and 
of pride ! And these seem only the roots of many 
other evil branches. O my God, I feel my heart 
as a den of thieves ! I loathe myself, but O ! 
I fall — a leper at thy feet. I believe "the 
blood of Jesus Christ cleanseth from all sin/' 
But when I would come to the fountain I 
seem all ignorance and helplessness. O 
Lord, teach and strengthen me, for thy 
mercies , sake ! 



42 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

I have had deep communion with my God, 
and much power at a throne of grace. I 
have a clear evidence of his pardoning love, 
and want nothing but his whole image 
stamped on my heart. 

I was greatly comforted this morning ; in 
spreading open the word of God on my 
knees, and praying for a conformity to it, I 
opened on i Thess. v. 16-ult. I see what is 
there required, in the very salvation my soul 
needs. O how is it summed up in that 
prayer of the apostle : " Now the very God 
of peace sanctify you wholly : and I pray 
God your whole spirit, and soul, and body, be 
preserved blameless unto the coming of our 
Lord Jesus Christ." And would St. Paul 
pray for what they could not obtain ? O no ! 
he believed that they should be both sancti- 
fied and preserved blameless ; for he says, 
" Faithful is he who hath called you, and who 
also will do it." Amen, Lord ! Let me, thy 
worthless creature, prove the truth of this 
word for Jesus' sake. 

Outward opposition now began to abate ; 
and many of my opposers were at peace with 
me. And now also the Lord began to reveal 
in my heart that sin was not all destroyed : 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 43 

for though I had constant victory over it, yet 
I felt the remains of anger, pride, self-will, 
and unbelief often rising, which occasioned a 
degree of heaviness and sorrow. At first I 
was much amazed to feel such things, and 
often tempted to think I had lost a measure 
of grace : yet when I looked to my Lord, or 
whenever I approached him in secret, he shed 
his precious love abroad, and bore witness 
also with my spirit, that I was still his child. 
Yea, and at this time I received many re- 
markable answers to prayer, many proofs of 
his undoubted love and goodness to my soul ; 
and I ever felt I would rather die than offend 
him ; so that I was a mystery to myself ! I re- 
solved, however, to use more self-denial of all 
kinds, and, whatever it cost me with respect 
to health or life, more fasting and prayer : for 
I hoped by these means to mortify and starve 
the evil tempers and propensities of my 
nature, till they should exist no more ; and if 
my body expired in the combat, I thought I 
was certain of endless life. I met with some 
also who told me, nothing but death would 
end this strife ! that this is the Christian's 
warfare, which cannot end but with the life 
of the body. After some time I began to 



44 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

believe these miserable comforters, and of 
consequence, longed for nothing so much as 
to die ; yea, I was impatient to be gone, that 
I might be freed from sin ; for I truly felt, 
and more so every day, — 

" 'Twas worse than death my God to love, 
And not my God alone." 

The Lord was pleased to make the preach- 
ing of Dr. Wright a great blessing to me. 
He clearly explained the nature of salvation 
from inbred sin; showed it to be as freely 
promised in Scripture, and as fully purchased 
by the blood of Jesus, as pardon. Also, that 
though sanctification in believers is a gradual 
work, yet the death of sin is instantaneous, 
and to be obtained by faith alone; just in like 
manner as justification. He recommended 
Mr. Wesley's Plain Account, and Farther 
Thoughts on Christian Perfection, and Mr. 
Fletcher's Polemical Essay, especially his ad- 
dress in the end of it to imperfect believers. 
These yet further opened my eyes respecting 
that great salvation ; and for reading them I 
shall praise God to all eternity. I now was 
powerfully convinced, that, whenever sin is 
totally destroyed, it is done in a moment. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 45 

From hence I could not rest, but cried to the 
Lord night and day, to cast out the strong 
man, and all his armor of unbelief and sin : 
assured that the power of the living God, and 
not death, must be the executioner ; the blood 
of Jesus the procuring cause ; and faith the 
only instrument. I had a deeper sense of 
my impurity than ever; and though by grace 
I was restrained from giving way outwardly, 
yet I felt such inward impatience, pride, fret- 
fulness, and, in short, every ill temper, that at 
times I could truly say, I was weary and 
heavy laden. 



46 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 



CHAPTER IV. 

ENTIRE SANCTIFICATION, AND ITS GLORIOUS 
RESULTS. 

This saintly lady was so blessedly converted 
that her face shone with the glory of God, so 
that her mother was astonished at the change 
in her countenance, and in her whole deport- 
ment. And yet we have seen what a mighty 
conflict she had with inbred sin. It is now 
our privilege to record how she found that the 
blood of Jesus Christ cleansed her heart from 
all sin. Let her tell this wondrous story in 
her own language : — 

On the morning of February 22, I awoke 
poorly in body, and felt a strange hardness on 
my heart, and a great backwardness to private 
prayer. Satan told me if I prayed, it would 
be only solemn mockery ; for my body would 
so weigh down my soul, that while my words 
flew up, my thoughts would remain below, 
and I should obtain no blessing. But I cried, 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 47 

' Lord, help me,' and fell instantly on my 
knees ; for a few moments my ideas were all 
distraction ; but the mighty God spoke to 
the troubled ocean, ' Peace, be still ! ' and 
there followed a great calm throughout my 
soul. My intercourse was now opened with 
my beloved, and various promises presented 
to my believing view. I thought, Shall I 
now ask small blessings only of my God ? 
Lord, cried I, make this the moment of my 
full salvation ! Baptize me now with the 
Holy Ghost, and the fire of pure love. Now 
'make me a clean heart, and renew a right 
spirit within me/ Now enter thy temple, 
and cast out sin for ever. Now cleanse the 
thoughts, desires, and propensities of my 
heart, and let me perfectly love thee. But 
here Satan raised all his force of temptations 
to oppose me ; suggesting to me, I had 
not been long enough justified ; I had 
more to suffer first, etc. And my views 
not being yet clear in the nature of this 
blessing, gave the enemy an advantage. 
For I thought when fully saved from sin, I 
could suffer no more ; feel no more pain ; 
make no more mistakes ; my judgment and 
memory would be perfect, and I should feel 



48 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

temptation no more ! Therefore this sug- 
gestion, that I had to suffer much first, had 
the more plausibility. But in that moment I 
received light from above, and cried, ' Lord, 
till my heart is renewed, I cannot suffer as I 
ought : give me perfect love, and I can then 
bear all things ! ' ' But,' said Satan, ' if this 
blessing were given, thou wouldst soon lose 
it again, in such and such trials which lie 
before thee : get past those trials first, and 
then come for this blessing.' But I cried, 
' Lord, I cannot stand those trials without it. 
O purify my heart, that I may be able to 
stand in the trying hour ! If I face my subtle 
enemies, while I have a traitor within, ever 
ready to betray me into their hands, how 
shall I be able to stand ? ' But if that ' strong 
man armed, be cast out with all his armor,' 
how much more able shall I be to contend 
with my outward enemies ? Many other 
temptations were presented : but I cried so 
much the more, ' Lord, save me ! ' And the 
Lord gave me that promise, 'I will circumcise 
thy heart, and thou shalt love the Lord thy 
God with all thy heart,' etc. I said, ' Lord, 
thou art faithful, and this is thy word ; I cast 
my whole soul upon thy promise : make 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 49 

ki^own thy faithfulness, by performing it on 
my heart. Circumcise it now, fill it now with 
thy pure love ; sanctify every faculty of my 
soul ; I offer all to thee, I give thee all my 
powers, I take thee, Almighty Jesus, for my 
wisdom, my righteousness, my sanctification.' 
Now ' cleanse me from all my filthiness and 
from all my idols ; take away the heart of 
stone, and give me a heart of flesh/ I come 
empty to be filled ; deny me not. It would 
be for thy own glory to save me now ; for 
how much better could I serve thee ! It is 
true, I have no plea but thy mercy ! the 
blood of Jesus, thy promise, and my own 
great need. O save me fully, by an act of 
free grace ! Thou hast said, ' He that be- 
lieveth shall be saved : ' I now take thee at 
thy word : I do by faith cast myself on thy 
promise. I venture my soul on thy veracity ; 
thou canst not deny ! Being purchased by 
thy blood, thy justice is engaged : being 
promised without money and without price, 
thy truth is bound : thus every attribute of 
my God secures it to me. 

Ah ! why did I ever doubt his willingness, 
when he gave Jesus ! Gave him to " destroy 
the work of the devil ; — to make an end of 



50 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

sin ! " The hindrance was in me, not him. 
He desired to make me holy, but unbelief hid 
it from my eyes ; accursed sin ! But now, 
Lord, I do believe ; this moment thou dost 
save. Yea, Lord, my soul is delivered of her 
burden. I am emptied of all ; I am at thy 
feet, a helpless, worthless worm : but I take 
hold of thee as my fulness ! Every thing that 
I want, thou art. Thou art wisdom, strength, 
love, holiness : yes, and thou art mine ! I am 
conquered and subdued by love. Thy love 
sinks me into nothing ; it overflows my soul. 
O, my Jesus, thou art all in all ! In thee I 
behold and feel all the fulness of the God- 
head mine. I am now one with God ; the 
intercourse is open ; sin, inbred sin, no longer 
hinders the close communion, and God is all 
my own ! 

O the depth of solid peace my soul now felt ! 
But not so much rapturous joy as at justifica- 
tion. It was 

" The sacred awe which dares not move ; 
And all the silent heaven of love ! " 

Yet when I rose from my knees, Satan once 
more assaulted me with, " Thou art going to 
face various trials, and a frowning world ; thou 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 5 1 

wilt soon lose this blessing." But instantly 
that scripture was given me, " He that keep- 
eth Israel neither slumbereth nor sleepeth : 
the Lord himself is thy keeper ! It is even 
he that shall preserve thy soul : the Lord 
shall preserve thy going out and thy coming 
in, from this time forth and for evermore/ ' 
" Lord," said I, " I feel my own insufficiency ; 
I can do nothing ; I can resist nothing ; but I 
commit the powers of my soul, the avenues of 
my heart, to thy keeping." Again he gra- 
ciously applied, " Blessed is she that believed; 
for there shall be a performance of those 
things which were told her from the Lord." 
" My God," said I, " it is enough ! My soul 
does trust thee, and I will praise thee." 

I now walked in the unclouded light of his 
countenance ; " rejoicing evermore, praying 
without ceasing, and in every thing giving 
thanks." I resolved, however, at first, I would 
not openly declare what the Lord had wrought ; 
but it was seen in my countenance ; and when 
asked respecting it, I durst not deny the won- 
ders of his love ! I soon found that repeating 
his goodness, confirmed my own faith more 
and more. And so did the Lord bless me in 
declaring it (yea, and blessed others also), 



52 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

that I was constrained to witness to all who 
feared him : — 

" His blood can make the foulest clean : 
His blood availed for me." 

I dared not to live above a moment at a time ; 
and that moment by faith in the Son of God. 
I never felt till now the full meaning of those 
words : " In him we live, and move, and have 
our being." And again, "I will dwell in 
them, and walk in them, and be their God : I 
will put my laws into their minds, and write 
them in their hearts." Glory be to my God, I 
felt it written there : it was no longer I that 
lived, but Christ that lived in me ! 

" Yea, Christ was all in all to me ; 
And all my heart was love." 

What a wonderful work of grace was that ! 
How she was transferred into the divine 
image and filled with the divine fulness ! The 
next entries in her journal are as follows : — 

Glory, honor, and eternal praise be to the 
God of love, for ever and ever ! His own arm 
hath brought salvation to my feeble, helpless 
soul. I am now wholly his ! I do love the 
Lord my God with all my heart, and soul and 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 53 

strength. I am nothing, and Jesus is my all. 
The enemy often suggests, " Thou wilt soon 
lose the blessing : thou canst not stand long." 
But my heart answers, I will hang upon, and 
trust my God, as long as I have any being ; 
and I know he will supply a feeble worm with 
power ! I have also opened on many sweet 
promises to-day. I find momentarily power 
now to pray and believe : yea, I live by faith ! 

Saturday, 24. — Last night and this morn- 
ing I had deep communion with my God. I 
feel I am indeed one with Christ, and Christ 
is one with me : I dwell in Christ, and Christ 
in me. O blessed union with him my soul 
loveth ! And the more I feel of his great 
love, the more I sink at his feet in humbling 
views of my own nothingness ; and here it is 
I would ever lie ; this is my own place : Jdsus 
alone is exalted ; and I, a poor sinner, saved 
from sin ! 

Sunday, 25. — Glory be to God for the best 
Sabbath I ever knew ! My body was so very 
weak and poorly, I could not go to preaching ; 
but the Lord was with me, and gave me fresh 
discoveries of my own emptiness and poverty, 
and of his abundant fulness. Those words 
were also powerfully applied, " Now ye are 



54 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

clean through the words which I have spoken 
unto you : abide in me and I in you : as the 
branch cannot bear fruit of itself except it 
abide in the vine, no more can ye, except ye 
abide in me." I also feel that gracious prom- 
ise mine : " If ye abide in me, and my words 
abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it 
shall be done unto you. " O the condescension 
of God to a poor worm. What a grant is this ! 
My soul draws near and humbly asks : — 

"Enlarge my faith's capacity, 
Wider and yet wider still 
Then with all that is in thee 
My soul forever fill." 

I was so happy that I could not sleep in the 
night. O what deep communion did my soul 
enjoy with God ! It was, indeed, a foretaste 
of heaven itself. This morning I prayed for 
a portion of Scripture to be impressed on my 
heart, that should abide with, comfort and 
direct me all the day, and I opened on, 
" Know ye not that your bodies are the tem- 
ples of the Holy Ghost, which is in you ? and 
ye are not your own, for ye are bought with 
a price ; therefore, glorify God with your 
body, and with your spirit, which are God's." 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 55 

Sweet portion ! O my blessed Lord, I rejoice 
that I am thy purchased property, and not 
my own ; and to thee I gladly yield body, soul 
and spirit. 

For some days it has been a season of out- 
ward trials with me; but I have enjoyed fel- 
lowship with God, and great inward comforts. 
I have ever found, when he gives peculiar 
grace, he permits it to be tried ; but I prove 
"as my day is, so is my strength." Yes, 
glory to his name alone, I am more than con- 
queror ! and feel it the constant language of 
my heart. 

u No cross, no suffering I decline, 
Only let all my heart be thine." 

She gives the following account of the first 
time she conversed with Mr. John Wesley, 
who was afterward one of her special friends, 
and after many years of heavenly communion 
with this father in the gospel, it was her lot 
to stand by his dying bed and comfort him 
when the messenger came to call him to the 
rest of heaven : — 

On Monday, April ist, Mr. Wesley came 
to Macclesfield, and I saw and conversed 
with him for the first time. He behaved to 



56 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

me with parental tenderness, and greatly re- 
joiced in the Lord's goodness to my soul ; 
encouraged me to hold fast, and to declare 
what the Lord had wrought. On Wednesday 
morning he set off for Manchester. He thinks 
me consumptive ; but welcome life, or wel- 
come death, for Christ is mine. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. S7 



CHAPTER V. 

BODILY WEAKNESS ASSOCIATED WITH A 
SERAPHIC SPIRIT. 

Mrs. Rogers from her youth suffered 
with a weak body, which was no doubt weak- 
ened by her eager attendance upon worldly 
pleasure. Besides, after her conversion, she 
consented to be a servant in her own family 
for the privilege of attending Methodist 
meetings. Then, such was the fire and fervor 
of her soul, and such the intensity of her joy 
in the Lord, and such the amount of her 
earnest labor in the cause of God, that she 
came near the point of death time after time. 

She was so full of the joy of the Lord that 
sleep departed from her eyes, and she lay in 
the raptures of heaven, while the silent hours 
of the night passed by. Hear her testimony 
on this and other points : — 

" I was so happy in the night, that I had 
very little sleep, and I awoke with these 



58 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

words, ' The temple of an indwelling God ! ' 
My soul sunk into the depth of nothingness, 
and enjoys closer union with him this day 
than ever before. Every moment I feel such 
a weight of love, as almost overpowers the 
faculties of nature ! I know I could bear no 
more and live ; but I often feel ready to cry, 

give me more and let me die ! — I long to 
be freed from the earth ! But help me, Lord, 
to wait resigned, willing to suffer, or do for 
thee. I need not lay this body down to 
feel thy presence ! Thou dwellest in my 
heart, and shalt for ever dwell ! Thou 
art my present heaven ; my soul's eternal 
all. 

M I went to bed last night so full of the 
love of God, I could not sleep for several 
hours ; but continued in secret intercourse 
with my Saviour. At preaching this morning 

1 was so overcome with the love and presence, 
and exceeding glory of my triune God, that I 
sunk down, unable to support it ! It was long 
before I could stand or speak ! All this day 
I have been lost in depths of love unutterable ! 
At the love-feast I was again overwhelmed 
with his immediate presence ! All around me 
is God ! 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. $9 

6 Within his circling arms I lie, 
Beset on every side ! ' " 

Some time after this, she writes : — 
" As I came from meeting I was so over- 
powered by the presence of God, that, had 
not a friend supported me, I could not have 
walked home. I was lost in the depths of 
love, and admitted, as it were, into the im- 
mediate presence of my Lord's glory ! Yet 
I cannot explain it, for I saw no manner of 
similitude ; and was humbled into the dust 
before him ! It is often impressed on my 
mind, the Lord is preparing me for some 
severe trial. My whole soul cries out, Thy 
will be done ! Only let thy grace be sufficient 
for me. 

4 Unsustain'd by thee, I fall ; 
Send the help for which I call ; 
Weaker than a bruised reed, 
Help I every moment need ! ' 

"Yes, — but, 

* I all thy power shall prove ; — 
Thy nature and thy name is love.* 

" Blessed be God, I feel this day an increase 
of holy nearness to him, and fellowship with 
him. At the prayer meeting, my body was 



60 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

quite overcome for half an hour together ! so 
did my Lord unfold his fulness of love to my 
soul. I seemed as in the presence of his 
glory, confounded and overwhelmed with a 
sense of his purity, and his justice, his grace, 
and love ! and was constrained to lie at his 
feet in speechless adoration and humblest 
praise ; while my body was covered with a 
cold sweat, and all around thought I was 
dying ! Well mightest thou say, O most 
adorable Jehovah, ' No man can see my face 
and live ! ' For, when thou displayest only 
one faint ray, one glimpse of thy glorious 
presence, this frail tabernacle is ready to 
crumble into dust before thee ! — But, O ! I 
shall one day be capable of beholding thee 
face to face ! These eyes shall see thy glory ! 
and gaze for ever in ecstatic bliss ! Now, 
this corruptible clay cannot support itself 
under the weight of thy love ; but then it 
shall have put on incorruption, and be able 
to enjoy the full and eternal fruition of thy 
glory. " 

Tuesday, June 4. — I find great weakness 
of body, but much of the divine presence, 
and resigned longings for immortality, I was 
at five o'clock preaching this morning, and 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 6 1 

there the Lord shed his love abroad, and all 
day I have had such a solemn nearness to 
him as I cannot describe. I called on one 
who, in the arms of death, is rejoicing in 
redeeming love, — her will perfectly resigned, 
and her evidence clear for a glorious eternity. 
What a sight ! O Jesus, this is thy victory ! 
O Satan, how art thou conquered ! 

Tuesday, July 6. — My weakness of body 
seems to increase ; and so does my union 
with Him my soul loveth. I was so happy in 
the night, that I had little sleep, and awoke 
several times, with those words deeply im- 
pressed, " The temple of an indwelling God." 
His love humbles me in the dust ; it seems 
as a mirror to discover my nothingness. 
Sometimes my weakness of body seems quite 
overpowered with the Lord's presence mani- 
fested to my soul ; and I have thought I could 
bear no more and live. But then I eagerly 
cry, " O give me more and let me die ! I 
long to be freed from earth ; but I am re- 
signed to live and suffer here." I found the 
following lines, which I received with some 
others, very reviving : — 

" My Dear Sister, — I fear I shall hardly 
see you again till we meet in paradise. But 



62 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

if you should gradually decay, if you be 
sensible of the hour approaching when your 
spirit is to return to God, I should be glad to 
have notice of it. It is a comfort ; to die is 
not to be lost ! 

* To earth-born pain superior you shall rise 
Through the wide wave of unopposing skies : 
When summoned hence, ascend heaven's high abode, 
Converse with angels* and rejoice in God.' 

Tell me, how far does the corruptible and de- 
caying body press down the soul ! Your dis- 
order naturally sinks the spirits, and occasions 
heaviness and dejection. Can you, notwith- 
standing this, rejoice evermore ? I shall be 
glad to know if you experience something 
similar to what Mr. De Renty expresses in 
those strong words : ' I bear about with me 
an experimental verity, and a plenitude of the 
presence of the ever blessed Trinity ! ' Do 
you commune with God in the night season ? 
Does he bid you in sleep go on ? And 
does he make even your very dreams devout ? 
That he may fill you with all his fulness, is 
the constant wish of," etc. 

I praise my God, who enables me, in a de- 
gree, to understand the above, and to answer 
those deep questions in the affirmative. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 63 

This day I have had much pain and weak- 
ness of body, but my peace has been as a 
river. O that my righteousness may be as 
the waves of the sea ! My uncle hath dis- 
owned my three cousins on account of hear- 
ing the Methodists. My cousins R. and J. 
are steadfast anJi more happy in God than 
ever. Poor C. has given up Christ for the 
world, and is therefore restored to the favor 
of his earthly parent. But O ! how will he 
appear when earth and heaven shall flee 
away ! Lord, make it a warning to me, that 
I may watch and pray and implore help every 
moment. 

Yesterday and to-day I have felt much in 
body and mind. Attending my dear mother, 
who is very ill, and sitting up with her till two 
o'clock every morning for a week past, has 
brought my body very low, together with my 
grief on her soul's account. Yet I have a 
secret confidence she will be spared till made 
meet for glory. I have also wrestled much in 
prayer respecting her. O my God, thou 
knowest what I feel ! Hear me for that pre- 
cious immortal soul, and make her thine ! 

My mother was taken dangerously ill yes- 
terday, and continues so. She takes little 



64 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

notice of anything ; but once to-day got hold 
of my hand, and said, " Pray for me." I was 
so much affected I could not answer her ; but 
the Lord gave me a wrestling spirit in her 
behalf, and keeps my mind stayed upon him. 

On Wednesday, my mother's complaint set- 
tled in one of her legs, and the doctor thinks 
it will save her life. I believe it was in an- 
swer to prayer. 

Thursday I spoke very plainly to her of the 
Lord's sparing mercy, and her need of a 
divine work upon her soul, which she received 
better than I expected, and told me she had 
terrifying dreams last night. Yesterday, she 
seemed quite of another spirit, and was severe 
with me, but this morning there appeared 
every mark of a rapid mortification in her leg, 
and, calling hastily for me, she cried, " I am 
gone ! I am gone ! Nothing can save my 
life ! " The doctor was greatly alarmed ; and 
I believed that unless God interfered by a 
miracle of almighty power and saving mercy, 
nothing could save her. She clasped me in 
her arms, and, with streaming tears, cried, 
" O my Hetty, forgive me all the uneasiness 
I have given thee ; and O pray for thy poor 
mother ! n My feelings were what cannot be 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 65 

expressed ; yet was I supported with a secret 
hope in my God respecting her ; and, going 
into a room alone, I was enabled to wrestle 
with him in faith. I had such communion 
with the Holy Trinity as words cannot de- 
scribe ! I felt, I knew, my prayer was heard. 
I returned to my mother, having been 
absent for about half an hour. I desired I 
might look again at her leg. But how it was 
changed ! O my God ! let me never forget 
thy mercy, thine indulgent, boundless love ! 
The places where it was black as coal were 
become a lively red, and the discharge of 
water clear as crystal was quite stopped. The 
doctor, coming in soon after, said with aston- 
ishment : "She is now out of danger." I 
could not forbear weeping aloud, and praising 
the God of my life and the answerer of my 
prayer. My poor mother also wept much : I 
never saw her so deeply affected. O may 
this be written on her heart never to be 
effaced ! I kneeled down by her bed and re- 
turned thanks to my God, and found more 
than common liberty to pray for her salva- 
tion. 



66 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 



CHAPTER VI. 

HER COMMUNION WITH THE FATHER, SON 
AND HOLY GHOST. 

There are many Christians of our day who 
know something of God the Father, and have 
a slight acquaintance with God the Son, but 
they have never become acquainted with the 
ever blessed Holy Ghost. But the Holy 
Ghost is a person as much as the Father or 
the Son, and we may become intimately ac- 
quainted with each person of the Trinity. 

None can read the memoirs or the journal 
of Mrs. Rogers without being struck with the 
remarkable and frequent mention of her in- 
tercourse with each person of the Godhead. 
It is very remarkable. I will give the reader 
a few quotations. 

Mrs. Rogers testifies "that she kept a diary 
of her life from the time of her conversion to 
God (in her seventeenth year) till within a 
few days of her death, amounting, with her 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 67 

letters and other manuscript, to not less than 
three thousand quarto pages, and every page 
clearly discovers that for the space of more 
than twenty years she enjoyed constant fel- 
lowship and communion with the triune God, 
and she never forsook her first love, nor lost 
a sense of the divine favor. None but those 
who live in the same spirit can properly con- 
ceive the degree of intimacy which subsisted 
between her and her God." She says, — 

"On Trinity Sunday, June, 1776, I met in 
the select society at six in the morning, and 
it was a blessed season to my soul. 

" Mr. Wright dwelt a little on the equal 
love of each person in the adorable Trinity, 
in a manner which I found truly profitable : 
afterward he preached from Eph. ii, 18, 
' Through him we both have access by one 
Spirit unto the Father/ He showed the dis- 
tinct relative offices of Father, Son and Spirit, 
in man's salvation, and that the love of the 
Father was ever equal ; as also that of the 
Son, and that of the Holy Ghost : that all the 
designs of the Son were the designs of the 
Father also, and of the Holy Ghost. He also 
spoke much of the near union and commun- 
ion with God, which believers might enjoy, 



68 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

especially those perfected in love. My soul 
was led into depths unspeakable, and saw 
such a fulness of God ready for me to plunge 
. that what I now felt seemed only as a 
crop compared with the ocean ! As I came 
into the chapel yard I felt peculiar union with 
the adorable Jesus, in all his offices of re- 
deeming love ; and that verse of a hvmn was 
so powerfully sweet as I had never felt it 
before : — 

' The opening heavens around me shine, 

With beams of sacred bliss : 
While Jesus shows his mercy mine, 
And whispers I am his.' 

"I was deeply penetrated with his pres- 
ence, and stood as if unable to move, and 
was insensible to all around me. While thus 
lost in communion with my Saviour, he spake 
those words to my heart : l All that I have 
is thine ! I am Jesus in whom dwells all the 
fulness of the Godhead bodily — I am thine ! 
My Spirit is thine ! My Father is thine ! 
They love thee as I love thee — the whole 
Deity is thine ! All God is, and all he has, is 
thine ! He even now overshadows thee ! He 
now covers thee with a cloud of his presence.' 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 69 

All this was so realized to my soul, in a man- 
ner I cannot explain, that I sunk down mo- 
tionless, being unable to sustain the weight 
of his glorious presence and fulness of love. 
At the altar this was renewed to me, but not 
in so large a measure. I believe, indeed, if 
this had continued as I felt it before, but for 
one hour, mortality must have been dissolved 
and the soul dislodged from its tenement of 
clay." 

" Friday, 21. — I prove through boundless 
mercy and free grace, an increasing inter- 
course and communion with my God every 
day. I lived and moved in him alone ! Where- 
ever I go, whatever I do, I feel the presence 
of the great Three-One here. ' Yea, he dwell- 
eth with me, and shall be in me/ This is his 
promise to my soul. I feel I am under his 
laving eye, and the continual guidance of his 
Spirit. I do indeed dwell in God, and God 
in me ! O love unsearchable to such a worm ! 

* I loathe myself when God I see, 
And into nothing fall ! ' 

" Sunday, 23. — In meeting with the select 
society again, I had unspeakable communion 
with the blessed Trinity. I had the same at 



70 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

the preaching altar. Mr. Percival's text was, 
1 O God, thou art my God.' A sense of the 
divine presence almost overcame my body. 
All the day I have been filled with a solemn 
weight of love and swallowed up in God, 
the eternal Father, Saviour, Comforter. At 
church, while that anthem was sung, ' I know 
that my Redeemer liveth, etc., I was so over- 
whelmed with the power of God, and had 
such a foretaste of his glory, I thought I 
should have died ! O the depths of his indul- 
gent, condescending love! He knows my 
trials, and the need I have of such consola- 
tions to strengthen and support my weak- 
ness. 

July 3. — In private prayer this morning 
my soul was let into God in a peculiar man- 
ner. My intercourse truly was with Father, 
Son, and Spirit, each distinctly, yet undivid- 
edly. I never felt more sweetness in offering 
and delivering up my will, all my desires, yea, 
every faculty of my soul, to the leadings and 
guidings of the Holy Spirit ; and that prom- 
ise is very precious : " He shall teach you all 
things." 

5th. Blessed be God, outward trials this 
day could not interrupt my union with him. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 7 1 

All compared with his love are mere straws, 
too insignificant to dwell upon a moment ! 
May I never look at anything but my heav- 
enly Father, my loving Redeemer, my divine 
Comforter ! 

6th. My body is extremely weak, but my 
soul filled with consolations from above. The 
word of God is peculiarly precious, yea, as 
David says, " sweeter than honey or the 
honey-comb.'' Yes, with him I prove it "a 
lantern to my feet and a light to my paths." 
It is a cordial in trials, a sword that cuts down 
my every foe, and a shield which, wielded by 
faith, repels every dart. I would not ex- 
change my title to one written promise for 
ten thousand worlds ! And are all the prom- 
ises mine ? O my soul, what a portion ! O 
my God, thy love secures them all to me ! In 
Christ Jesus, my covenant-surety, they are all 
yea and amen to my soul. 

I have had sweet union and communion 
with the adorable Trinity, and his love pene- 
trates my soul and humbles me in the dust. 
I feel myself unworthy of the least of his mer- 
cies, yet He, the source of bliss, unites him- 
self to me, and calls himself my God ! Yea, 
he owns me for his child ; he listens to my 



72 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

every cry, supplies my every want, reveals 
himself my Friend, my Father, and my God ! 
He teaches me in ignorance, strengthens 
me in weakness, comforts me in trouble, 
gives me power to do his will, and then re- 
wards ! 

March 7. — I awoke in a spirit of prayer 
and of love, and in secret renewed my cov- 
enant with God, even the Father, the Word 
and the Holy Ghost, surrendering afresh my 
body and soul, with all their powers, to be kept, 
guided and governed by him in all things. 
He owned me for his child, and sweetly as- 
sured me, "I am thy God." I sunk into 
nothingness before him, but felt him my all 
in all. I was so filled with gratitude, after 
breakfast, while singing, 

" Through hidden dangers, toils and deaths, 
He gently cleared my way ; 
And through the pleasing snares of youth, 
More to be feared than they." 

that my eyes overflowed with tears. 

I have been very ill the past week. It was 
thought I had a malignant fever. On Tues- 
day, my fever was high, and my head much 
affected, but I found inexpressible sweetness 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 73 

in my God, hanging, as it were, between life 
and death, wholly at his divine disposal who 
gave me breath, and whose alone I am. 
Thursday, and yesterday also, I continued 
very ill, but last night the fever apparently 
left me. 

I dreamed in the night that I was convers- 
ing with a friend, and that an effusion of 
divine love overflowed my soul and overpow- 
ered the faculties of nature ; and I was, as it 
were, caught up to heaven, and unutterably 
lost in God. I thought, however, my bodily 
powers and faculties returned ; and when 
come to myself my friend asked me what I 
felt or saw when thus overpowered, and I 
answered it was unspeakable ; I could not 
explain it. He then inquired what ideas I 
felt most impressed on my heart when I came 
to myself, and I replied : " The unmerited 
condescension of the adorable Trinity to the 
most unworthy of worms, with sweet and 
peculiar views of the Godhead manifested in 
Jesus Christ, and the equal love of the Father 
and the Holy Spirit." 

In continued weakness of body, my God is 
graciously near, and I have sweet intercourse 
with the adorable Trinity ; and in prayer my 



74 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

God seems to say : " Ask what thou wilt, and 
:ne unto thee." I have had pecu- 
liar power to ask the salvation of S. EL, and 

also this day wrote a faithful letter, which I 
intend to get copied by a friend and put into 
the Chester post. I believe my Lord will 
hear me for that soul. 

At night I found liberty to speak to my 
mother of the happiness my soul feels in God. 
How dadlv I could leave the bodv beinsr as- 
sured of eternal glory, through Jesus' blood, 
which has drawn the sting of death ! 

4th. I bless thee, O my adorable Lord, for 
great nearness to thyself this day. My soul 
hath fed on angels' food, and lives on earth 
the life of heaven ; for what is heaven but 
love ? What is it but the full fruition of the 
God of love ? But as none comprehends the 
blessedness of loving thee, even on earth, 
with all the soul, and mind, and strength ; of 
dwelling in thee, and having constant com- 
munion with the Father and the Son through 
the Spirit who reveals the Triune God ; how 
can our most enlarged capacity, then, con- 
ceive of thy glory when thou unveilest the 
brightness of thy face to disembodied spirits, 
so that the wondering hosts above shall lie 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 75 

forever at thy feet, lost in an ecstasy of 
praise ? 

" What more than ecstasy, when all, 

Struck to the golden pavement fall, 

And silence speaks thy praise ! " 



/6 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 



CHAPTER VII. 

HER COXXECTIOX WITH JOHN WESLEY AND 
. JOHN FLETCHER. 

John Fletcher stood in the same relation 
to John Wesley as Melancthon did to Martin 
Luther. The one was a Reformer, the other 
was a Defender, and in each case God raised 
them both up to mutually help each other, 
and to push forward his cause and kingdom. 
Miss Roe (who was afterwards Mrs. Rogers) 
had a very close connection with John Wes- 
ley and John Fletcher. They were socially, 
intellectually, morally and spiritually on the 
same plane. They were each " contending 
for the faith once delivered to the saints/' 
and for the highest experiences of our holy 
religion. John Wesley acted the part of a 
father to this fatherless minister's daughter. 
He treated her as his daughter in the gospel, 
for she was converted in connection with his 
first visit to her native town. Some of her 
choicest letters were written to him. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. JJ 

She says, in her journal : Yesterday, Mr. 
Wesley arrived and seemed more filled with 
the spirit of his Lord than I ever knew him 
to be. I spent an hour with him soon after 
he came, and it was a season of blessings. 
The recollections of what the Lord had 
wrought for me since I saw him last, both in 
his dealings in providence and grace, con- 
strained me to vent the emotions of my grate- 
ful heart in tears, and the Lord's dear servant 
rejoiced with me and over me with parental 
affection. Well may I sing with joyful lips, 

" O the infinite cares, and temptations, and snares, 
Thy hand hath conducted me through ; 
O the blessings bestowed of a bountiful God 
And the mercies eternally new ! " 

Dear Mr. Wesley preached at five this 
morning, from " Jesus increased in wisdom 
and stature, and in favor with God and man." 
O my God, if he in whom there was never 
spot of sin could grow in wisdom and thy 
favor, well mayest thou exhort thy saints to 
grow in grace. Lord, help me ! O may I 
increase in every grace, 

" And deeper sink and higher rise, 
Till thou transplant me to the skies." 



78 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

The text yesterday evening was, " I am the 
resurrection and the life : he that believeth in 
me, though he were dead, yet shall he live ; 
and whosoever liveth and believeth in me 
shall never die." John xi, 25, 26. How sweetly 
did Mr. Wesley prove from this the Godhead 
of Christ, and then spiritualize the subject, 
showing faith to be the one and only condi- 
tion of salvation, and therefore offered, in the 
name of Christ, life to all who would now be- 
lieve ; enforcing the latter promise also, " He 
that liveth and believeth in me shall never 
die." 

This morning at five he strongly enforced, 
" The kingdom of heaven suffereth violence, 
and the violent take it by force." After 
breakfast we had a profitable season in visit- 
ing the sick. Two precious souls proved 
that the feet of our Master were behind us ; 
for he spoke liberty and peace to. their 
wounded spirits, and we left them rejoic- 
ing in his love. Mr. Wesley, as he came out, 
said, " Salvation has come to this house," 
while the tears trickled down his cheeks. 

O how present was the God of love while 
his servant insisted on that text, " With men 
this is impossible, but with God all things are 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 79 

possible !" How sweetly and clearly did he 
prove that the blood of Jesus cleanseth from 
all sin ; inviting all to partake of this great 
salvation, and to come now by faith ; enforc- 
ing that " one day is with the Lord as a thou- 
sand years ;" and observing, that every work 
of God on the soul of man, is for Eternity. 

Mr. Wesley preached at five this morning, 
from "O Timothy, keep that which is com- 
mitted to thy trust." He showed what were 
the things committed to Timothy, and then 
confined his discourse to the particular doc- 
trines committed to the Methodists, and in- 
sisted that the doctrine of Christian Perfection 
was the one peculiar point they were called 
to preach and practise, and that no other 
people under heaven did clearly insist on this 
as a present and an instantaneous salvation. 

Again she writes : 

Soon after Mr. Wesley arrived I drank 
tea with him at Mr. Ryle's. I think he is 
more alive and full of love to God than ever. 
I spent some time with him in the evening, 
and he behaved with fatherly affection. I 
never had more solid comfort in his company ; 
never found it more truly profitable. 

Mr. Wesley preached in the morning at 



80 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

five from " Blessed are they that hunger and 
thirst after righteousness ; for they shall be 
filled.'' He addressed his discourse princi- 
pally to believers, and offered a free and pres- 
ent salvation from all sin in forcible terms. 
Many were comforted and established in the 
faith. 

I breakfasted with him at nine o'clock, and 
accompanied him in his chaise to Leek, where 
at one o'clock he offered salvation to all from 
" The kingdom of heaven is at hand." He 
showed, first, when the Gospel of Christ is 
preached, and received, in any nation, city, 
town, neighborhood, or family, it may be said 
the kingdom of God is set up there ; or if any 
individual embraces Christ and the glad tid- 
ings of salvation by faith, the kingdom of 
God is set up in that heart and completed 
when his kingly power is manifested, and all 
his foes in that heart slain, so that he reigns 
alone. Then, secondly, what it consists in : 
righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy 
Ghost; all these begun by justification ; but 
when " Holiness to the Lord " is written upon 
the living tablet of the heart, that whatever 
would oppose itself to them is entirely rooted 
out. He then enforced the text : this "king. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 8 1 

dom of heaven is at hand." He addressed 
himself to people of all states and conditions, 
young and old, to drunkards, swearers, Sab- 
bath-breakers, thieves, liars, and lewd persons, 
and told them : " You may now be delivered 
from the power of your most besetting sins 
even this day, this moment. The kingdom 
of heaven is at hand. Serve the devil no 
longer ; he is a bad master. Yield now to 
him who loveth you, who died for you, who will 
save you from your sins here and from hell 
hereafter." 

As we returned, Mr. Wesley said : " I never 
saw a more lovely congregation ; they were 
like melting wax, just fit for divine impres- 
sions. But God was with us, there's the 
secret ! " tears filling his eyes. 

At six he preached in our chapel. His 
text was " God resist eth the proud, and giv- 
eth grace to the humble : humble yourselves 
therefore under the mighty hand of God." 
When I returned home in the evening I 
found my dear mother quite kind and affec- 
tionate, and Cousin Robert and I both prayed 
with her. O my God, thou canst do all 
things ! 

Easter Day, March 31st. — Rev. Mr. Wes- 



82 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

ley preached at the new church this morning 
from " Christ is risen indeed." He showed 
that there is a rational and experimental evi- 
dence of this, but that the latter is to be pre- 
ferred ; that as Christ Jesus rose again for 
our justification, so the moment any vile, pol- 
luted sinner believes on Christ, and is justi- 
fied, in that instant this experimental evidence 
begins ; he receives the Spirit of adoption 
whereby he can at that moment cry, " Abba, 
Father, my Lord and my God ! " But this 
experimental evidence is much stronger when 
that promise is fulfilled, " I will send the 
Comforter to abide with you forever." He 
then observed that this indwelling of God as 
our sanctifier is the privilege of all believers, 
and is received by faith in like manner as jus- 
tification. 

We will now record some of her blessed 
interviews with Rev. John Fletcher. Mark 
the following account of their meeting : 

I was kept all day in solemn expectation of 
blessings in seeing and conversing with Mr. 
Fletcher, till just before he arrived it was 
suggested, " Thou wilt be disappointed ; thou 
art expecting from man and not from God." 
For a moment my faith seemed staggered ; but 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 83 

I fell on my knees before the Lord, owning 
him as the only source of all my hope and 
happiness, and he so abundantly filled me 
with his love that I was almost overpowered, 
and felt as if I must have expired at his feet 
had not tears relieved me. During these 
moments of communion with my God, Mr. 
Fletcher, Miss Bosanquet and Mrs. Crosby 
arrived. When I entered the room the heav- 
enly man was giving out the following hymn 
with such animation that I seldom witnessed ; 

" Near us, assisting, Jesus stand ; 

Give us his opening heavens to see : 
Thee to behold at God's right hand, 
And yield our panting souls to thee." 

After this he poured out his soul to God in 
prayer. Indeed his every breath seemed to 
be a continuance of prayer, or praise, or spiri- 
tual instruction, and every word that fell from 
his lips appeared to be accompanied by an 
action from above. 

Then Mr. Fletcher explained what he 
meant by the expression that "all who enjoy 
perfect love possess also the gift of prophecy/' 
By this he did not mean the miraculous gift 
of foretelling future events, but the magnify- 



84 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

ing God by speaking unto men with a new 
heart of love and the new tongue of praise, as 
on the day of Pentecost those who were filled 
with the Holy Ghost glorified God by speak- 
ing of his wonderful works as the Spirit gave 
them utterance. This utterance he called the 
gift of prophecy, and earnestly insisted that 
we might all prove the same baptismal fire of 
love that descended on that day on the prime- 
val Church, seeing the promise was unto them 
and to their children, and to all them that are 
afar off, even as many as the Lord our God 
shall call ; that we, as they, if we assert our 
privilege, may, with great power, bear witness 
of the grace of our Lord Jesus, and spread 
the flame of love we feel by speaking unto 
edification, and exhortation, and comfort 
among all our acquaintance. One hundred 
and twenty such souls, he believed, would set 
the world on fire. 

But, he observed, the reason why those per- 
fected in love did not more fully spread the 
savor of grace was, because they do not, in 
general, plead for a more abundant outpour- 
ing of the Holy Spirit, both in his gifts and 
graces. He then earnestly exhorted all pres- 
ent to seek this fulness of love and this gift 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 85 

of utterance, and taking my hand, proceeded, 
" Will you, my sister, be one who shall spread 
the sacred flame ? " 

He also said, " Come, my friend, I will 
covenant with you : we will join to magnify 
the Lord, and bear our testimony before men 
and angels. Will you ? " 

In deep humility, but filled with the pres- 
ence and power of God, I answered, with 
flowing tears, " In the strength of God I 
will." 

" Glory be to God ! Glory be to God ! " said 
he, many times over, and his holy soul was 
filled with praise. Lord, strengthen my feeble 
dust to keep this covenant even unto death. 

Last Wednesday evening, she writes, Mr. 
Fletcher instructed and commanded me by 
his word, " Reckon yourselves, therefore, to 
be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God, 
through Jesus Christ." I obeyed the voice 
of God, and now obey it, by declaring the 
praise of his love. I am free from sin. Yea, 
I now bear witness to the glory of his grace. 
I am "dead indeed unto sin, and alive unto 
God through Jesus Christ. ,, 

Mr. Fletcher then related his experience, 
as follows : 



86 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

" I have received this blessing four or five 
times before, but I grieved the spirit of God 
by not making confession, and as often I let 
it go. I lost it by not observing and obeying 
the order of God, who hath told us, 'With 
the heart man believeth unto righteousness, 
and with the mouth confession is made unto 
salvation ; ' which latter I neglected. 

"Once the tempter suggested, 'What you 
feel cannot be the blessing : perfection is 
something higher. You are not delivered 
from mistakes, ignorances, real errors in judg- 
ment, in memory, etc. ; therefore, though you 
are delivered from sinful tempers, you ought 
not to make a profession that you are holy/ 
I listened to these things, and soon discov- 
ered I had lost what God had bestowed. 

" When I had reobtained the same glorious 
deliverance, the bait was offered under an- 
other form. The enemy now said, 'Wait a 
few days, or weeks, and see if the fruits of 
sanctification appear, before you profess so 
great a salvation ! ' I had no sooner yielded 
to wait for the fruits, but I began to doubt of 
the witness which before I had felt in my 
heart, and was in a little time sensible I had 
lost both. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 8/ 

" A third time, with shame I confess it, I 
was kept from being a witness for my Lord 
by the suggestion, ' Thou art a public charac- 
ter, a city set upon a hill ; the world and pro- 
fessors have all an eye upon thee ; and if 
some future trial should overcome thee, or if, 
as before, thou shouldest, by any means lose 
the blessing, what a dishonor and reproach 
will it be to the doctrine of heart-holiness !" 

" A fourth time Satan prevailed over a worm 
by, ' It is true thou art now freed from sin ; 
thou knowest that Gospel perfection is per- 
fect love ; that love is the fulfilling of the law, 
not of Adam, but of Gospel grace ; and that 
many ignorances, mistakes, etc., are consistent 
with perfect love ; but how many thousands 
will not believe this ! How many affirm that 
every transgression of the Adamic law, the 
law of perfect innocence suited to Adam's 
sinless nature, his perfect body and soul, 
every transgression of this law is sin! and 
therefore if thou profess thyself freed from 
sin, all these will give thy profession the lie. 
Enjoy therefore what God hath wrought in 
thy soul, and hold it fast, without declaring 
publicly, " I am freed from sin ; I am holy ; I 
am perfect in love." ' But again I found, ' he 



88 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

that hideth his Lord's talent, and improveth 
it not, from that unprofitable servant shall be 
taken away^even that he hath.' 

" Now, my brethren, you see my folly. I 
have confessed in your presence, and now 
I resolve in your presence also, henceforth I 
will confess my master to all the world. And 
I declare unto you, in the presence of God, 
the Holy Trinity, I am now * dead indeed 
unto sin/ I do not say I am crucified with 
Christ, because some would say by this you 
can only mean a gradual dying unto sin, for a 
man who is crucified is a long time in dying. 
But I profess unto you I am dead unto sin, 
and that as effectually as my original nature 
was freed from righteousness. But then if 
our good brethren (the Calvinists) will still 
insist every ignorance, every involuntary mis- 
take, is a sin, we will not quarrel. Then in 
this sense I am not free from sin, for I 
am not freed from these things. But if I 
may venture to believe my Lord Jesus, 
if love be the fulfilling of the law, then I 
know that these things are consistent with 
love, with a single eye and a pure heart ; and 
I therefore dare to reckon thus in the pres- 
ence of you all, and I mean to declare myself 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 89 

henceforth, before men and angels, ' dead in- 
deed unto sin, and alive unto God, through 
Jesus Christ/ 

" Mind, it is through Jesus and in Jesus, 
not independent of him, or separate from him. 
I have taken him to be my prophet, priest, 
and king, my indwelling holiness, my all in 
all. He is all I want, and I wait for the more 
full and entire fulfilment of that prayer of 
Christ, Let them be one in us ; even that pen- 
tecostal blessing, that baptism of the Spirit 
poured out on the whole church, now upon 
earth, that shall make -us all of one heart and 
one mind. O for the feelings of the dispensa- 
tion of the Holy Ghost ! O my brethren, O 
sisters, pray for the effusion of the Spirit ! 
Wrestle, agonize with God, till it be given. ,, 

Then he called upon all present to confess 
the Lord Jesus, and said, " If any have not 
the gift of utterance, pray for it, and it shall 
be given. You are commanded to love and 
earnestly pray for gifts, not for your sake, 
but for that of the church. A man without 
gifts is like a thing in disguise, he appears as 
a subject only. You are kings and priests 
unto God, put on your robes and wear your 
garter conspicuous to all, i Holiness to the 



90 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

Lord.' Reckon yourselves now dead indeed 
unto sin." 

After Mr. Fletcher ceased, about thirty 
witnessed for Jesus that they, through grace, 
were dead indeed unto sin, and alive unto 
God, through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Num- 
bers were so affected that they could not 
speak. I sank into nothing. I was lost in 
the fulness of the Triune God ! 

When the meeting was concluded, Mr. F., 
taking hold of my hand, said, " Glory be to 
God, my dear sister, for the testimony you 
have borne this night!" and, still holding my 
hand between his, he repeated several times, 
"Glory be to God ! " I was so afresh filled 
with a weight of love, that I was constrained 
to retire and vent my full soul in tears before 
the Lord. 

Then she was called to the important posi- 
tion of leading a class, of which she writes as 
follows : 

Mr. Smith told me this morning that he 
had promised I should lead his class. I felt 
some exercises of mind respecting it, through 
a deep sense of mine own insufficiency; yet, 
w r hen he urged it, I dared not refuse, and I 
found comfort in that word, " My strength is 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 9 1 

made perfect in weakness;" and, as I went 
to the class, that promise was given, " My 
presence shall go with thee." I opened the 
hymn book on that precious hymn : 

" O for a heart to praise my God," etc.; 

and in singing it was filled indeed with the 
divine presence and love unspeakable. Prayer 
was as the gate of heaven, and I sensibly felt 
that the words given me to speak were not 
my own. I think I never was so entirely led 
out of myself, and influenced by a divine 
power, while the people seemed like melting 
wax before the fire. O my Lord, let me meet 
them in thy kingdom ! 



92 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 



CHAPTER VIII. 

SOME OF HER SPIRITUAL LETTERS. 

Letter to Mr, Robert Roe, when at college, about six 
months after his conversion. 

Macclesfield, Nov. 29, 1776. 

Dear Cousin, — As I find, by your brother, 
you have been reasoning with the enemy of 
your soul, and thereby, in some measure, have 
distressed your own mind ; and as you request 
me to write, I dare not refuse, for I know 
God can use the weakest instrument to com- 
fort his children ; and often does, that we may 
ascribe all glory to him alone. May he who 
comforteth those who are cast down, be your 
support. 

As to your falling from God I do not fear 
it ; and I am sure it is your happy privilege 
constantly to rejoice in his love, — that love 
which so clearly spoke your sins forgiven. 
Oppose that adversary of your soul by faith ; 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 93 

this shield (saith the apostle) " shall quench 
all the fiery darts of the wicked." Be reso- 
lute, and determine to conquer. Jesus, in our 
nature, hath bruised the serpent's head ; and 
your union with your living Head will give 
you power to conquer too. Fear not, saith 
God, for I will help thee. By a simple living 
faith cleave constantly to Jesus ; and though 
earth and hell combine, they shall not be able 
to overcome or hurt you. Believe even 
against hope ! and when things seem impos- 
sible to you, weak and helpless as you are, 
remember they are possible with God. Lay 
open to him your every care : 

a His heart is made of tenderness : 
His bowels melt with love." 

He delighteth not to see his children 
mourning, cast down and oppressed ; but 
kindly saith, " I will not leave you comfort- 
less, I will come unto you:" and again, "I 
will send you the Spirit of truth, that he may 
abide with you for ever." The privileges of 
a justified soul are very great ; for, " if a child, 
then an heir, an heir of God," — of all his 
promises. Praise God that you feel the ne- 
cessity of heart holiness, and press after it, 
even after " all the mind which was in Christ 



94 LIF E AND JOURNAL OF 

Jesus." He is already your wisdom and 
righteousness, and he will become your sanc- 
tification. O look for it, seek it, expect it ; 
expect it as you are, expect it now. Behold, 
saith God, I stand at the door and knock : 
open to your Beloved, and he will come in 
and fill your happy soul. 

Be diligent in your studies. It may be a 
cross, but take it up for Christ's sake, and it 
will not hurt your soul. Above all, continue 
in prayer ; often read the word of God upon 
your knees and his Spirit will explain it to 
your heart. With respect to your situation, 
or any temporal thing, be not careful ; live 
the present moment, and lay no scheme for 
to-morrow ; you may then be in eternity ! 
" Instead of busying our minds," saith Wes- 
ley, " with dwellings on the grievous part of 
what is past or to come, we should remember 
that the gospel does not permit us to dwell 
on anything but the presence and love of God 
who fills our souls." However you may be 
tempted, resolve you will not reason, except 
with the Lord at the throne of grace. Seek 
more union and communion with your God : 
you may attain much of this, even before you 
are sanctified. But O ! never rest till all your 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 95 

evil nature be destroyed, and every root of 
bitterness plucked up; till you have given 
your God all your loving heart. And remem- 
ber with him, " Now is the accepted time — 
now is the day of salvation." He cannot be 
more willing or more powerful than he is to- 
day. 

As to myself, I see no end to my Lord's 
goodness. I find every day an increase of 
love, joy, peace and union, close, intimate 
union with the Great Three-One. 

" All my treasure is above, 
All my riches is his love." 

I feel I am very unworthy, yet offering up 
myself and my services on that altar which 
sanctifieth the gift, my God accepts a worth- 
less worm through his beloved Son. He who 
is higher than- the highest, stoops to dwell in 
my happy soul ; and I have communion with 
him as a man and a friend. Sometimes in 
the night he so fills my soul with his glorious 
presence, that I think it will burst its prison 
and wing away: and then, O then, where 
should I be ? Surrounded with angels, and 
convoyed by them to my God — my life, my 
treasure, and my crown ! I can even now 



96 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

scarce support the blissful thought. O what 
a present heaven of love I feel ! 

,; O what are all our sufferings here, 
If, Lord, thou count us meet 
With that enraptured host t' appear, 
And worship at thy feet." 

It cannot be long ere we lay these bodies 
down : — 

u Our conflicts here shall soon be past, 
And you and I ascend at last, 
Triumphant with our Head ! 

Rejoice in glorious hope ; 

Jesus the Judge shall come, 
And take his servants up 
To their eternal home : 
We soon shall hear the archangel's voice, 
The trump of God shall sound, ' Rejoice ! ' " 

I remain your sincere friend in Jesus, 

H. A. ROE. 

Letter to the same. 

Macclesfield, Dec. 10, 1776. 

My Dear Cousin. — I am thankful if mv 
letter was any comfort to your mind ; to God 
be all the glory : I hope you are now enabled 
to rejoice, and are filled with that peace which 
from believing flows. I hope your heavenly 
intercourse is open, and that day by day you 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 97 

open still wider the door of your heart, that 
you may more and more be filled with God. 

" Ready are you to receive, 
Readier is your God to give." 

I trust your studies are now made a bless- 
ing, and that in them you enjoy the presence 
of Jesus. Let not little difficulties discourage 
us who serve so good a master: — us who have 
in view a heaven of glory ! Jesus left that 
heaven — to suffer, bleed, and die on our be- 
half : O ! then, let us take up our every cross, 
and despising the shame, manfully suffer 
with him ! Love makes all things easy : 

" 'Tis this that makes our cheerful feet 
In swift obedience move ; 
'Tis this shall tune our joyful song 
In those sweet realms above." 

I long to be all dissolved in love ; for " God 
is love ; and he that dwelleth in love, dwelleth 
in God, and God in him." 

I have had many trials and some tempta- 
tions of late ; but I am firmly persuaded that 
while I cleave simply to Jesus, nothing shall 
be able to separate me from his love : no, nor 
to lessen the divine flame which I feel con- 
tinually burning in my heart. Those pre- 



98 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

cious words, " My grace is sufficient for thee," 
shall stand firm as the pillars of heaven : and 
when the enemy would tell me — In such and 
such a trial thou wilt be entangled and over- 
come, I tell him, "My Lord hath prom- 
ised strength equal to my day," and all his 
darts are instantly repelled. Nor do I only 
conquer : but after my enemy is put to flight, 
I have more love, more peace, and nearer 
union with my God. O the blessedness of 
intimate fellowship with him ! — of possess- 
ing that testimony that we please him : surely 
it is a taste of heaven : and yet it is only a 
drop out of the ocean : as a grain of sand 
compared with the sands on the sea-shore ; 
only the beginning of an eternity of glory. 
O ! for an archangel's tongue to magnify our 
adorable Redeemer's name ! We can but lisp 
his praises here ; but we shall join in nobler 
strains above, to praise for evermore the 
Three in One : 

§i The heavenly principle assures, 
And swells my soul with strong desires 
To grasp the starry crown." 

The Lord is carrying on a glorious work 
here. Our love feast last week was a blessed 
season of the outpourings of his Spirit : every 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 99 

one had reason to say, " This is none other 
than the house of God ; this is the gate of 
heaven." Several, who came there burdened 
and heavy-laden, went away rejoicing ; three 
found a clear sense of pardon, and two others 
were set at perfect liberty from the remains 
of sin. The preachers all wept abundantly 
tears of joy, so were they filled with God : 
and indeed I believe there were very few dry 
eyes. Mr. Percival says there is just such 
another pouring out of the Spirit in Bolton : 
above thirty joined the society there in ten 
days. I know this will rejoice your heart. 
O let us pray much for a guilty world ! I 
believe this will be a glorious year of the 
power of God. I do not cease to pray for 
you ; and remain your affectionate cousin and 
friend, h. a. roe. 

Letter written at a time when she was supposed to be 
near death, and addressed to a lady of her ac- 
quaintance. 

Macclesfield, Jan. 9, 1778. 

Farewell, my friend ! To the care of 
that God of truth and love, who hath been so 
gracious unto me, I commend you. May you 
prove all the riches of his grace in life, and 



100 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

lay down this earthly tabernacle with the 
same joy and assurance of hope as I now 
do. " I have fought the good fight, I have 
finished my course, I have kept the faith ; 
and henceforth there is laid up for me a crown 
[a never-fading crown] of righteousness, which 
the Lord, the righteous Judge, shall give me 
at that day." I joyfully declare, it is by grace 
alone I am saved : Jesus is all in all, and I am 
nothing without him. 

I believe you will bear with a friend if she 
leave the following dying cautions : and O 
may the spirit of holiness write them on your 
heart : Deny yourself wholly, take up your 
cross daily, and follow Christ fully. Watch, 
fast, pray. Avoid all occasions of temptation 
resolutely ; but if at any time you are over- 
come, delay not to fall at the feet of Christ 
that moment for pardon and strength. The 
eyes of earth and heaven are upon you : many 
wait for your halting, more, I trust, wish you 
success in the name of the Lord : I am sure I 
do, and therefore write without reserve. Take 
care of your own understanding : do not suffer 
yourself to think of it but with deep abase- 
ment that you have made no better use of it. 
Do not adorn your body now if you wish to 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. IOI 

be found adorned with Christ in the day of 
eternity. I sit under the shadow of my Be- 
loved. ' While I write, I feel him sustaining 
my soul. O Jesus, great is thy goodness, 
great is thy mercy ! I feel my insufficiency 
to speak of the goodness of my God : it is 
more than I am able to express : I enjoy in 
him all I want ; but am daily more sensible 
how little I am. O how his grace is magni- 
fied in a poor worm ! You also have tasted 
of his love ; may you follow him fully and 
steadfastly. While you do this, though 
storms should arise, and winds blow, they 
will only settle and fix you more fully on the 
Rock which cannot be moved. Believe sim- 
ply and constantly, so shall you love stead- 
fastly and entirely : then shall the Lord guide 
you continually, and satisfy your soul in 
drought ; and your soul shall be as a 
watered garden, and as springs of water that 
fail hot. 

Farewell, — I was going to say for ever ; 
but ah ! no. I shall see you again : may it be 
where we shall rejoice together in that joy 
which cannot be taken away from us : then 
shall we part no more, but live for ever in the 
presence of our Jesus. h. a. roe. 



102 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

Letter to Mr. Robert Roe. 

Macclesfield, Feb. 12, 1778. 

Dear Cousin, • — Since I wrote you before, 
I have been, to appearance, on the borders of 
eternity. My body was indeed brought very 
low ; but my soul was full of heavenly vigor, 
and longing for immortality. O what heav- 
enly transport filled my ravished breast, when 
I thought I had done, for ever done, with all 
below ; and, as I then thought, in a few days, 
or weeks at most, I should leave my cum- 
brous clay, to bask in the beams of uncreated 
beauty, — should stand before the slaugh- 
tered Lamb, and see the wonders reserved for 
me : 

" Should fall at his feet, 
And the story repeat, 
And the lover of sinners adore." 

When I should be lost in Father, Son, and 
Spirit, — overwhelmed and implunged in the 
fathomless abyss of all eternity. What I felt 
cannot be described : it was a real taste of 
joys immortal; it was a drop of heaven let 
down. But, behold ! I am yet spared ; infin- 
ite Wisdom protracts my stay a little longer, 
and I bow my soul in resignation at his feet. 
I am not my own, but his ; and O ! may my 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. IO3 

language ever be, " Not as I will, but as thou 
wilt." I find I need not drop the body to 
enjoy the presence of my God : he dwells in 
my heart : in him I live, — he surrounds, sup- 
ports, sustains me : wrapped in his being, I 
resound his praise ! O the heartfelt com- 
munion my soul enjoys with him — the inti- 
mate converse, the sweet fellowship ! My 
spirit is filled and yet enlarged. It often 
seems as if mortality could bear no more ; 
and yet my desires are insatiable. I long to 
plunge deeper into God. 

I rejoice to find, by your last letter, that 
you are cleaving to your Lord, and happy in 
his precious love. O that every day and hour 
you breathe, you may sink deeper into him ! 
All, all you want is there. Let not your 
trials be any discouragement : nay, " Rejoice 
and be exceeding glad, for great is your 
reward in heaven." Remember every cross 
is a pledge of your crown, and all your suffer- 
ings will add to your eternal weight of glory. 
I hope you are all in earnest for the precious 
pearl of perfect love ; O look up to a present 
and a faithful God ! Ask, and you shall re- 
ceive ; all things in him are now ready : be 
not faithless, but believing. Hath he said, 



104 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

" I will circumcise thy heart," and will he 
not do it ? Sooner shall heaven and earth 
pass away than his promise fail, if you only 
embrace it by believing. O claim your privi- 
lege — the inheritance of the land of promise, 
the rest of holiness purchased for you by 
blood ! Go up and possess it — fear not — 
come now, just as you are — empty, to be 
filled — filthy, to be cleansed. 

" Sink into the purple flood, 
Rise to all the life of God." 

Be assured I ever remember you at the 
throne of grace, and remain your friend and 
sister in Jesus, h. a. roe. 

Letter to Miss Bourn, of Newcastle, Staffordshire. 
Macclesfield, Aug. 20, 1778. 

My Dear Sister, — I was glad to receive 
yours by Mr. Hall. It always gives me 
pleasure to hear from you. In the bonds of 
divine love, my soul is united to yours : and, 
from the contents of your letter, as well as 
the power I had in your behalf with God, I 
am assured that before long you will be a 
happy witness that Jesus can and will, and 
does destroy the last remains of sin in his 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. IO5 

children's hearts in this life : yea, in every 
such heart as does truly hunger and thirst 
after righteousness. You do hunger and 
thirst. O that you could look to him this 
moment as a precious Saviour ! Is he not so ? 
Do you not feel his loving presence ? Are 
you not his ; the purchase of his blood ; the 
new-made creature of his love ; born of God, 
and become his child ? Is not Jesus your 
beloved and your friend ? Can he then deny 
his own Spirit's cry in your heart : and that 
too when all you ask is, that he will destroy 
his own enemies in your soul, and enable you 
to love him with all your heart ? But as to 
that temptation, " If you receive it now you 
will soon lose it ; " is he not able and willing, 
and faithful to keep, as he is to save ? Yes, 
glory to his holy name, I know he is. He is 
the all-sufficient God, and, saith he, " My 
strength is made perfect in weakness." Trust 
him, then, poor, weak, and helpless soul. 
" But it is not long enough since you were 
justified." Does God tell you so? Has he 
set any limited time ? None that I know of 
except the present. He saith, Now, " to-day, 
if you will hear my voice." And again, " Now 
is the day of salvation." And again, " Come, 



106 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

for all things are now ready." He has com- 
manded, " Thou shalt love the Lord thy God 
with all thy heart, with all thy mind, with all 
thy soul, and with all thy strength : " and he 
hath promised, " I will circumcise thy heart," 
that thou mayest do it. But does he ever 
say, " Suffer so much, or stay so long, and I 
will do it ? " Nay, but he saith, " If any 
man thirst, let him come unto me and drink. 
Ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may 
be full." 

My dear Miss Bourn, there are some in 
this town who have not been justified so long 
as you ; who have received and do profess 
this blessing, O then, come once more, even 
as you came when first reconciled to God, 
and cast your soul simply on Jesus ! Would 
he bleed for us when rebels, and will he re- 
fuse to avenge us of our inbred foe, when we 
are his beloved children ? Surely no ; it can- 
not be. I hope soon to see my dear friend, 
and that she will be able to tell me she has 
obtained this precious salvation. 

Did you ever read Mr. Wesley's sermon on 
the Scripture way of salvation ? You would 
do well to consider the conclusion of it atten- 
tively. " Hereby," says he, "you may surely 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. IO7 

know whether you are seeking to be sanctified 
by faith or by works. If by zvorks, you want 
something to be done first before you are 
sanctified. You think, 'I must first be, or do 
thus or thus.' Then you are seeking it by 
works unto this day. On the other hand, if 
you seek it by faith, you may expect it as you 
are; and if as you are, then expect it now. 
Do you believe we are sanctified by faith ? 
Be true then to your principle, and look for 
this blessing just as you are, neither better 
nor worse : as a poor sinner that has nothing 
to pay, nothing to plead, but Christ died. 
And if you look for it as you are, expect it 
now ; stay for nothing : why should you ? 
Christ is ready, and he is all you want." Let 
your inmost soul cry out, 

" Come in, come in, thou heavenly guest, 
Nor ever hence remove ; 
Settle and fix my wavering soul, 
With all thy weight of love." 

Glory be to God, he carries on a glorious 
work among us here. Sinners are convinced, 
many are justified ; and lately, several back- 
sliders have been restored. One poor soul, 
that had been long wandering from her God, 
was restored last night, while a few of us 



108 LIFE AXD JOURNAL OF 

were at prayer. I am, my dear friend, yours 
in Jesus, h. a. roe. 

Letter to a preacher of the gospel, in answer to some 
inquiries relative to the state of her sotcl. 

Macclesfield, Dec. 6, 1778. 

Dear Sir, — To tell you one thousandth 
part of the preciousness of Jesus, is a task 
impossible to men or angels. To my soul, he 
is truly and altogether lovely : the one object 
in which all my desires, expectations, and 
affections centre — the Alpha and the Omega. 
To him my more than all I owe, being 
snatched by his grace, a brand from everlast- 
ing burnings. My surety he is ; my life, my 
peace, my treasure, my husband, brother, 
friend — my wisdom, my righteousness, my 
sanctification ; my all in all, for time and for 
eternity. Him and him alone, I desire : him, 
and him alone, I love. 

u I have no sharer of my heart, 
To rob my Saviour of a part, 
And desecrate the whole ; 
His loveliness my soul has prepossess'd, 
And left no room for any other guest." 

Yet, O how is my heart expanded when I 
see I have yet received but, as it were, a drop 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. IO9 

out of the ocean ! but a glimpse of his pre- 
cious fulness ; and an eternity of growing 
bliss lies yet before me ! This glorious pros- 
pect truly lays me where I would for ever 
lie, at his dear feet, the monument of his 
mercy. O that I could praise him as I 
would ! but language fails and I long for that 
day when I shall praise him in nobler strains 
above. Were he to give the summons now, 
and call me from earth away, O how gladly 
could I wing my flight this hour ! Loose 
from creature and created good, I only wait 
the joyful word, Come up higher ! Then 
would I exulting 

" Clap the glad wing, and soar away, 
And mingle with the blaze of day." 

In that blessed kingdom, dear sir, I hope to 
meet you, though perhaps on earth we may 
meet no more. In the meantime may you be 
filled with all the fulness of Father, Son, and 
Spirit ; rejoicing herein with increasing joy, 
and made very useful in your Lord's vine- 
yard. So prays sincerely your real well 
wisher for Christ's sake, h. a. roe. 



110 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

Letter to the Rev. J. Wesley. 

January 6, 1782. 

My very Dear and Honored Sir, — I 
have still good news to tell you. Glory be 
to God, he is working graciously among us. 
Cousin Robert has been the instrument of 
four persons believing, and receiving sanctifi- 
cation since I wrote last. One of them is a 
class-leader, and in all who now profess this 
salvation, the change is very evident : they 
walk and follow after God as dear children, 
who truly love him with all their hearts. On 
the watch-night, a young woman who experi- 
enced this salvation some years ago, but had 
lost it, received it again, as Mr. L. was say- 
ing, " Come by faith alone, if you have no 
worthiness, no fitness ; believe only, and love 
shall make all things new. Delay not a mo- 
ment : come now, and God will destroy your 
inbred sin," etc. 

Mr. L.'s word is made a blessing to very 
many. Several backsliders are restored ; 
many convinced of sin, some converted, and 
a number longing to love God with an undi- 
vided heart. O ! how I love thus to see the 
prosperity of Zion ! I feel indeed a sweet 
assurance, through grace, that if all around 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. Ill 

me were careless and lukewarm, my soul 
would cleave to its only centre, with all its 
powers and affections : but how much more 
does it animate and enliven my spirit ; how 
increase my joy ; yea, how does it strengthen 
my hands, to see my dear brethren rejoicing 
and glorying in the same precious salvation, 
and living as it becomes the redeemed of the 
Lord ! There are persons, besides those I 
have mentioned, who can say, they feel noth- 
ing contrary to love, and are kept in perfect 
peace ; but dare not yet profess that they are 
cleansed from all sin. I now meet two bands, 
and, blessed be God, we do not meet in vain. 
My soul dwells truly in a present heaven : 
the eternal Trinity is my God and my all. 
Every power and faculty is swallowed up in 
him. 

" I nothing want beneath, above, 
Happy in his perfect love." 

I was surprised to hear that you had been 
at Chester and Wrexham : but, I trust, if you 
did not come to preach a funeral sermon for 
a friend, you came to shake Satan's king- 
dom. 

We had a precious love-feast. Some peo- 
ple tell me I always have precious times, and 



112 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

therefore judge others have so too ; but I be- 
lieve most that were present are agreed in 
this, that we have had no love-feast like the 
last for many years. The select band is very 
lively. I have just been there, since I beg:.:: 
my letter, and find another soul has received 
the witness of sanctihcation under Mr. L. this 
morning. I know you will join me to 
praise a God of love. Glory be to his holy 
name. 

"Our days of praise shall ne'er be past- 
While life, and thought, an:! being last, 

In a day or two after I wrote to you, the 
pain in my face and head was suddenly re- 
moved in answer to prayer, and I have hardly 
felt it since. Till then I had no liberty to 
pray for its removal, but. hearing that my 
bands never met, during my sickness, and 
that several neglected to meet in the select 
band, whom I persuaded to go before, I said, 
" Lord, if thy unworthiest servant can be a 
blessing to their precious souls, remove this 
affliction/' it is enough ; " and I will praise 
thee." And the prayer was heard. In ten 
:_d instances I thus prove him a God 
that heareth and answereth prayer. I a::: 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. II3 

filled with his goodness ; I know not where 
to begin that praise that never shall end. I 
remain, dear and ever honored sir, your un- 
worthiest child in bonds of divine love, 

H. A. ROE. 

Letter to the same. 

April 7, 1782. 

Rev. and Dear Sir, — Glory be to him, 
to whom all glory is ever due. He fills my 
happy soul with humble joy unknown. I 
dwell in his sacred presence ; he dwells in my 
worthless heart, and all wrapped up in him 
I am. 

Your last sermon on the Monday morning 
was made a peculiar blessing to very many 
precious souls, who say, they are sure God 
directed you to speak just as you did. Some 
others indeed say, you preached a new doc- 
trine, which they never heard before, except 
from cousin Robert Roe, respecting a present 
salvation ; for they cannot believe that per- 
sons can be justified or sanctified unless they 
have undergone a long preparation, etc. Nay, 
they have even affirmed that he or my- 
self desired you to preach that sermon, and 
to mention the person who was convicted, 
justified, and sanctified in twelve hours. 



114 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

Why should we wonder at these things? 
The remains of the carnal mind at one time 
in myself would have strongly opposed the 
simplicity of faith. But O ! how precious do 
I now prove the experience of these words, 
" I am crucified with Christ ; nevertheless I 
live ; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me ; and 
the life that I now live in the flesh, I live by 
faith in the Son of God, who hath loved me, 
and given himself for me." How mistaken 
are those who say, to speak much of living by 
faith, or of coming to be justified or sanctified 
by faith alone, is setting aside good works ? 
For, can there be a gospel faith which does 
not work by love ? And does not love work 
all holy obedience ? Excuse me, dear sir, I 
have been led to say more on this subject 
than I intended ; my soul being peculiarly 
blessed since I began to write. Indeed, I 
often find it so when I write to you. He 
makes you in various ways an instrument of 
much good to my soul. How unworthy am I 
of his innumerable mercies ! Praise the 
Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me 
praise his holy name. 

A dear young woman, who received sancti- 
fication about three months ago (who has 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. I 1 5 

been a follower of God for six years, and found 
his pardoning love at the age of fourteen), is 
now to all appearance on the borders of eter- 
nity ; and no pen can describe the holy tri- 
umph of her" soul. It is a blessing to be near 
her. On Tuesday last, as I was repeating 
and enforcing some of the passages in your 
last sermon, and a few parallel promises, an- 
other young woman, who had been seeking 
the blessing two years by works, was by faith 
brought into full liberty, and still retains the 
clear witness that she is cleansed from all sin. 
And while Mr. S offered a present salva- 
tion, a young woman was justified. J 

S writes word that he has reason to 

praise God for his journey to Macclesfield, 
and is determined to preach an instantaneous 
present salvation from all sin. I trust your 
going to Chester will strengthen his hands. 
I cannot tell how much I am filled with a 
spirit of prayer for you, and a sweet assurance 
that God is about to use you as a more pecul- 
iar instrument of good than he has ever 
done. I look for an abundant outpouring of 
the Spirit. Whenever I hear of souls being 
blessed, those words are applied, " Ye shall 
see greater things than these"/ ' May the ful- 



Il6 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

ness of the Triune God ever fill your happy 
soul ! and may you still help me to love him 
more, prays your most unworthy, but ever 
affectionate, h. a. roe. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 117 



CHAPTER IX. 

HER ACQUAINTANCE AND MARRIAGE WITH 
REV, JAMES ROGERS. 

Mr. Rogers was an able minister of the 
New Testament, — not of the letter that kill- 
eth, but of the spirit that giveth life. Mark 
the following quotations from her journal : — 

March 27, 1781. — This day at my uncle 
Roe's, I saw Mr. Rogers for the first time. 
He and Mr. Bardsley are come over from 
Sheffield to see cousin Robert, who respects 
Mr. Rogers much, having received good from 
his preaching at Leeds. We had a blessed 
season in prayer together ; and cousin Mar- 
garet Roe, in particular, seemed stirred up 
and comforted. Afterward we called on that 
dying saint, David Pickford ; who witnessed 
a good confession of the love of Jesus, which 
he has felt experimentally for these thirty-six 
years ; and proves him yet faithful. At night 
Mr. Rogers preached from, " You that are 



Il8 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

troubled, rest with us." And at five o'clock 
next morning, Mr. Bardsley enforced that 
blessed portion, "Fear not, for I am with 
thee ; be not dismayed, for I am thy God," 
etc. I felt both peculiar seasons of divine 
blessings : and though afterward tried at 
home, it was a day of deep consolation. 

Some time after this she lived in the family 
of Mr. Rogers, and took care of his wife in 
her last sickness. 

After the death of one of her dearest friends 
she writes : — 

In the year following I had another trying 
scene to pass through. Dear Mrs. Rogers, 
after the birth of her little James, never re- 
covered her health. Mr. Rogers, being a 
great deal in the country parts of the circuit, 
I was very much with her ; and our love for 
each other daily increased. At different 
times she opened her whole heart to me on 
very tender points ; for we were as one soul. 
For several weeks before her death, she en- 
treated me not to leave her when I could pos- 
sibly help it. But as her experience and 
triumphant death are already published, I 
forbear to enlarge respecting either. O, my 
Lord, let my latter end be like hers ! 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. II9 

After a wonderful chain of divine provi- 
dences, on which we need not dwell, she was 
married to Mr. Rogers, August 19, 1784, in 
whom the Lord gave her a helpmeet indeed, 
just such a partner as her weakness needed 
to strengthen her. They were of one heart 
and of one soul. 

They spent a week or more after their mar- 
riage with her mother, and then hastened to 
Dublin, Ireland, where Mr. Rogers was ap- 
pointed to labor. They were gladly received, 
and the Lord gave them the hearts of the 
people. Their hands being thus strengthened 
of the Lord, they agreed solemnly to devote 
themselves wholly to God and his work. God 
gave them a blessed revival in three years. 
The Society increased from about five hun- 
dred and upward to eleven hundred and up- 
ward. They had good cause to believe that 
four hundred were converted to God. 

In August, 1789, we came over from Dub- 
lin to see my mother at Macclesfield. Mr. 
Wesley, and several preachers with families, 
also coming at the same time to England, we 
took the whole ship. In this passage we 
were in imminent danger, by dashing on a 
rock called the West Mouse. But prayer was 



120 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

made, the Lord heard, and wonderfully deliv* 
ered ! We landed at Park Gate, and travelled 
with Mr. Wesley to Macclesfield, where my 
mother received us with great affection. After 
the Manchester conference, we returned to 
Dublin, where we had left our little boy. 
We spent about a week with our very affec- 
tionate friends there, and then proceeded to 
Cork. 

Here also the Lord graciously revived his 
work. His word prospered and prevailed; 
and we had cause to rejoice, not only over a 
few individuals, but several families, who were 
added to the fold of God. We found three 
hundred and ninety-seven members in so- 
ciety ; and left six hundred and fifty. In the 
last year we had some close trials through a 
few individuals, but our spiritual mercies 
overbalanced them all. I do not know that I 
ever enjoyed more of the Lord's presence than 
at Cork, except during the time of a severe 
nervous fever, and then the cloud was only 
for a few days ; and that I believe was merely 
owing to the body, for though in a week after- 
ward all the feelings of nature were touched, 
I felt nothing contrary to resignation, pa- 
tience or love. At the time of which I 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 121 

now speak my own recovery was doubtful. 
Mr. Rogers (oppressed with grief through my 
illness, and by his attention to me night and 
day) was very ill. James (the child) had a 
fever ; the maid was confined with sickness, 
and my little John, six weeks old, in convul- 
sions for three days ! Surely, in this scene, 
the Lord magnified his power in supporting 
my weakness, and enabling me to say, " Good 
is the will of the Lord." After this season 
my consolations were abundant, and my faith, 
love and communion with God much deep- 
ened. I had some encouraging letters from 
Mr. Wesley. In his last two he mentioned 
his intention of removing us to London at 
the ensuing conference. I trembled at the 
thought of such an important charge, but 
committed it to God in much prayer. And 
notwithstanding our various exercises of body 
and mind since we came to this city, I am 
certain divine love has mixed every cup, and 
ordained all things well. 

They were appointed to labor in London, 
and thus they were near the City Road Church 
and parsonage where Mr. Wesley had his 
headquarters, and where he died. They were 
with him five months before he died, and wit- 



122 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

nessed his last and glorious triumph. Of this 
she writes in her journal as follows : — 

To be with that honored and much loved 
servant of God, Mr. Wesley, for five months, 
and then to be witness of his glorious exit, 
was a favor indeed. But O ! how awful the 
scene ! — how unspeakable the loss ! I pecul- 
iarly felt it ; being then in a weak state, not 
quite recovered from my late sickness. 

The solemnity of the dying hour of that 
great and good man I believe will be ever 
written on my heart ! Well might Dr. Young 
say, " The chamber where the good man 
meets his fate, is privileged beyond the com- 
mon walk of virtuous life, quite in the verge 
of heaven ! " A cloud of the divine presence 
rested on all ! and while he could hardly be 
said to be an inhabitant of earth, being now 
speechless, and his eyes fixed, victory and 
glory were written on his countenance, and 
quivering, as it were, on his dying lips ! O 
could he then have spoken, methinks it would 
have been nothing but victory! victory! — 
grace ! grace ! glory ! glory ! No language 
can paint what appeared in that face ! The 
more we gazed upon it, the more we saw of 
heaven unspeakable ! Not the least sign of 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 23 

pain, but a weight of bliss. Thus he con- 
tinued, only his breath growing weaker and 
weaker, till, without a struggle or a groan, he 
left the cumbrous clay behind, and fled to 
eternal life in the bosom of his faithful Lord. 

When I look back on the afflictive scenes 
we have passed through since this trying 
event, and consider we are yet monuments of 
grace and saving power, I am lost in wonder 
and in love. Mr. Rogers, in particular, has been 
tried as in the fire, and exposed, through his 
office, as a mark to shoot at ; yet, through in- 
finite mercy, I believe he will come out of it 
all more fully purified. I might here enlarge 
on particulars, but shall leave the Lord's 
faithful servants, as well as the instruments of 
their sufferings, to Him who will plead the 
cause of the innocent, and " make all things 
work together for good to them that love 
God ; " praying, with our suffering Lord, for 
those who now persecute him in his mem- 
bers, " Father, forgive them, for they know 
not what they do." 

I shall now only observe, as it relates to my 
own experience, that these trying exercises of 
my dear partner have been keenly felt by me. 
And my nervous system, weakened by that 



124 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

dangerous fever at Cork, has also greatly suf- 
fered by these things ; which, like " wave 
upon wave, have followed each other ! " To 
this I ascribe it chiefly, that a cloud of heavi- 
ness has, at some seasons, hung upon my 
mind; and that Satan has taken occasion to 
suggest, in those times of depression, various 
accusations of shortcomings in zeal, activity, 
and spiritual joy. I do not mean that I was 
ever left in darkness ; no : since I first con- 
sciously received a sense of favor with God, I 
never lost it ; but within two years last past, 
I have not always had so clear a witness of 
perfect love. At other times I have had that 
witness full and clear ; and at all times could 

say, 

" None but Jesus will I know, 
None but him do I desire. 

Whom have I in heaven but thee ? 
Thou art all in all to me." 

But in nothing else than full salvation, and 
the witness of it, could my soul ever rest. O 
no ! What is past experience without present 
enjoyment ? I must feel, or I cannot be happy. 

Sunday, Nov. ii, 1792. — This day it is 
eighteen years since I received the knowledge 
of a reconciled God. O that I were in a 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 25 

deeper sense a " mother in Israel ! " My Lord 
has ever been faithful to me. In all my per- 
secutions he comforted me. In the alluring 
snares of youth, he saved, he kept me. It 
was by his grace I forsook all ; denied myself 
ease, pleasure, friends ; and after he had 
proved me, he gave me easier circumstances, 
and one of the best of earthly friends. He 
has instructed my ignorance, and strength- 
ened my weakness. Through various scenes, 
and in outward perplexities, how often have I 
received immediate teaching from God ! In 
travelling from city to city, how have I been 
protected by guardian love, and saved from 
fear and danger on the watery deep ! May I 
never forget the ten thousand proofs of his 
love in Dublin, in Cork, in London ! He hath 
given me favor in the eyes of his children in 
every place, and helped me feebly to serve them. 
He hath given me spiritual children also, some 
of whom are lodged safely in his bosom, and 
others in the way to glory. I have had five 
lovely children in the flesh : and besides these, 
my dear Joseph and Benjamin, left with me 
in charge, and to whom I feel united in all 
the tenderness of parental love ; nor have 
they ever been wanting in a due return. One 



126 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

(a fine boy) my Lord has taken to the abodes 
of bliss ; and for the rest he assures my heart, 

" The children of thy faith and prayer, 
Shall all to thee be given." 

At present, I am sinking into the arms of 
love, and I do feel that I am all the Lord's. 

I feel grateful to my God that I am placed 
here (at Spitalfields), though but for a season ; 
where I can enjoy more retirement, and less 
of busy life. My God is with me, and I trust 
he will draw and unite more fully to himself 
his helpless creature ! I have power with 
him in prayer, and I know he will answer my 
enlarged requests, for myself, my other self, 
and our offspring. We shall be his : I will 
be his alone. This day I consecrate to him 
my soul and body's powers, my life, my all. 
May his blessed spirit come and seal me his 
abode ; ratify the covenant ; and with the 
Father and the Son dwell for ever in my 
heart. Amen. O my God, I sign myself 
over to thee ! This solemn hour, 

" My soul and body I resign, 
With joy I render thee 
My all, no longer mine, but thine 
To all eternity." 

HESTER ANN ROGERS. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 127 



CHAPTER X. 

REMARKABLE ANSWERS TO PRAYER AND 
WONDERFUL DREAMS. 

March 5, 1790. — In private, I had pecul- 
iar liberty in praying for my dear husband, 
that he might experience all the depth of 
Jesus' love more abundantly than ever, and 
be the happy means of leading me also into 
further degrees of inward salvation ; that our 
union might ever tend to a yet closer union 
with our God, and all our outward mercies 
lead to this. While I prayed, I felt assured 
my Lord was well pleased, and would send an 
answer to my largest desires. Next morning 
Mr. Rogers awoke very happy, having had a 
precious view of the deep things in God : 
he dreamed that he felt the clear witness of 
sanctification, and his soul seemed full of 
gratitude and love. In taking a ride out to- 
gether, and laying open our whole hearts to 
each other, as we frequently did, I found my 



128 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

soul unspeakably happy ; while we resolved 
to be more spiritual, more devoted to God, 
and more zealous in saving souls than ever. 
This was made a great blessing to me : and 
doubly so, as I believe it an answer to my 
prayer. 

June io, 1794. — I had a peculiar season 
in wrestling with God this night, on account 
of my dear little Mary. The great weakness 
of her limbs for three months past, and her 
seeming total inability to walk, has caused 
much pain to my dear husband, as well as to 
myself. It appears to me I had used every 
possible means in vain. But this night I had 
power to cry unto my God, and tell him, 
"Thou art the same yesterday, to-day, and 
forever : thou art my God. Thou hast said, 
' Call upon me in the day of trouble, and I 
will hear thee/ Thou hast healed cripples, 
made the lame to walk, yea, raised even the 
dead in answer to the prayer of faith ! Lord, 
hear me now : stoop to my request, let the 
child's feet and ankle bones receive strength, 
give power to walk, and let me soon know 
thou hast heard my prayer ; " and I had power 
to believe it should be done : and my soul 
was filled with the divine presence. Thurs- 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 29 

day, the 12th. — I already see an answer to 
my prayer in the child. She is greatly 
strengthened in her limbs. How good, how 
faithful, how condescending is the Lord. We 
may — I may, like Abraham, like Moses, like 
Elijah, ask and obtain. 

God was pleased to manifest himself to 
Mrs. R. in dreams and visions of the night to 
strengthen her in times of trouble, and warn 
her in times of danger. How blessed it is 
that while we are awake we can be thinking 
of God, and while we are asleep God can be 
thinking of us, and manifesting himself to us. 
Mark the following : — 

Having been exercised with an uncommon 
sense of various shortcomings and daily in- 
firmities for some days past, I awoke this 
morning, lost, overwhelmed and swallowed up 
in love, joy, and praise, occasioned by the fol- 
lowing dream. I thought I was in an elegant 
house, and was desired by one to go into that 
room (pointing the way), and I should see the 
late Mrs. Rogers. I wondered, but obeyed : 
I thought I entered the room, which was 
hung all round with clean white linen ; and 
upon a bed I saw the beautiful corpse of my 
dear departed sister and friend ! I looked, 



130 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

and loved the precious remains ; when, to my 
great astonishment, her eyes opened ! She 
smiled on me, and raised herself up. I ex- 
claimed, in a rapture of joyful surprise, "Is it 
possible ! has the Lord permitted you to re- 
vive, so as to speak to me ? " She replied, 
with unutterable sweetness, " All things, my 
dear, are possible with God. He has permit- 
ted it for your comfort." "O!" said I, 
" what would I have often given to converse 
one hour with you, since you were taken?" 
She said, " There was no need, my dear, God 
has been with you." I answered, " Yes, he 
has ; but O, tell me, have I acted my part 
aright in your place ? Does God, in this, ap- 
prove of me ? " She smiled again, and said, 
" He does : and in all things he is well 
pleased, and he will yet strengthen and bless 
you to the end ! He loves you, and will save 
you in every time of trouble. You have 
nothing to fear : for you will be happy in life, 
in death, and for ever. You are dear to God : 
and it is to comfort you that he permits me 
to appear to you and tell you this." 

I thought in my dream she said much 
more, but this is all that I can distinctly re- 
collect. And it so overcame me with trans- 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. I3I 

port that I awoke. My body was bathed in 
sweat, and my soul as in a dream, filled with 
God, with heaven, and with unspeakable 
bliss, so that I could not refrain from wak- 
ing my dear husband to tell him, and could 
sleep no more, but continued praising God 
until the morning. The more I consider 
his condescending goodness herein, the more 
I am lost in love, self-abasement, and speech- 
less gratitude. 

This dream was made a great blessing to 
us both, and it is attended with no small con- 
solation to me, especially under my present 
circumstances, to conceive that the inhabi- 
tants of heaven know well the transactions of 
earth. 

Sunday, June 16, 1782. — Having been 
very poorly, I discontinued my Journal to this 
day. Glory be to God, it has been a solemn 
day of peace and joy in the Holy Ghost ! 

22d. — Cousin Robert Roe desired me to 
meet a number of friends at his new house. 
We had a solemn season in prayer, and S. N. 
was enabled to believe for full salvation, and 
to rejoice in a clear sense of it. Many others 
were encouraged, and my cousin was truly 
happy. 



132 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

Rev. Mr. E. sent her a letter with an ac- 
count of the sudden and awful death of one 
of his hearers. - He called upon her, and 
found her looking very sad. When he inquired 
for the reason, she answered, " Sir, I will 
think no more of it, — it was only a dream, 
and I will not be so childish as to be alarmed 
at a dream. But, sir," said she, "I will tell 
you my dream, and then I will think of it no 
more." She then repeated as follows : " I 
dreamed I was at the ball, where I intended 
to go to-night. Soon after I was in the room 
I was taken very ill, and they gave me a 
smelling-bottle, and then I was brought home 
into this room ; I was put into that elbow- 
chair (pointing to it), and fainted and died ! 
I then thought I was carried to a place where 
there were angels and holy people in abun- 
dance, singing hymns and praises to God : that 
I found myself very unhappy there, and de- 
sired to go from thence. My conductor said 
if I did, I should never come there again. 
He then violently whirled me, and I fell 
down, down — through blackness, and flames, 
and sulphur ; the dread of which awoke me ! " 

The minister endeavored, by every possible 
argument, to dissuade the young lady from 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 33 

going to the ball that night, but in vain ; she 
answered, " I will go. I will not be so fool- 
ish as to mind a dream ! " She did go : and 
soon after she came into the ball-room she 
was taken ill : and, as she dreamed, a smell- 
ing bottle was given to her. She was carried 
home, into the room, and put into that very- 
elbow-chair, represented in the dream ; — she 
fainted, — and died ! 



134 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 



CHAPTER XL 

CLOSING SCENES OF HER HOLY LIFE. 

She says : I awoke very happy this morn- 
ing, with these sweet words — 

u God, the almighty God, is thine ; 

See him to thy help come down, 

The excellence divine." 

And O, how was I blest while musing on 
that precious scripture, " Now we see through 
a glass darkly ! " It was indeed a blessed 
season to my soul ; especially for a few min- 
utes, when I felt what I cannot explain. Such 
a manifestation of God as a spirit, uniting 
himself to my spirit ; such a real enjoyment 
of God as love, as holiness, as heaven, that 
fulness which thought cannot fathom. And 
all this for me ! My all and in all : united in- 
explicably with my spirit : more than filling 
all my powers with his effulgence, so that I 
was wrapt in God. O my Lord, and shall I 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 35 

prove for ever this vision, this fruition of thy 
fulness ? / know I shall. Thou hast given 
my soul a taste. Thou wilt give me the 
abiding reality when time is no more. O 
thou thrice holy God of love, my soul is lost ! 
Wonder and love overpower me quite. I am 
abased before thee, while I feel the sacred 
blessing mine. 

My mind has been led of late to meditate 
on the latter-day glory : and the Lord's pres- 
ence rested upon me in a peculiar manner, 
while attending to those beautiful ideas of Mr. 
Fletcher on the millennium ; especially where 
he observes, " That as now the world is over- 
spread with iniquity, so shall it then be with 
holiness ; insomuch that a wicked man shall 
then be as great a wonder upon earth as a 
father in Christ is now ! That the curse shall 
be taken away from universal creation, vege- 
table, animal, and elementary : the bodies of 
men no longer subject to pain and weakness. 
The lion will then be as inoffensive as the 
lamb ; and the leopard lie down with the kid : 
'for they shall not hurt nor destroy in all my 
holy mountain (saith our God), for the earth 
shall be full of the knowledge of the glory of 
the Lord, as the waters cover the sea.'" 



I36 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

Mrs. Rogers was generally and well known 
among all the Methodists of her day. She 
was such a bright and shining light that 
her influence was felt far and wide. From 
the beginning she had struggled with a frail 
body, and this was overtaxed when she was 
compelled to do her mother's housework, 
that she might have the privilege of attend- 
ing the Methodist meetings. Besides, her 
life of fasting and long seasons of prayer, and 
her intensity and fervor of spirit, together 
with her great zeal and activity in the cause 
of God, all these seemed to point to an early 
death. A number of times she went down to 
the borders of death, and had a desire to de- 
part. We must now record her early death. 
She left this world, and all her many friends, 
amid a scene of pathetic beauty, though at- 
tended with the saddest anguish of her sex. 
After giving birth to her fifth child, she lay 
composed for more than an hour, with heaven 
in her countenance, praising God for his 
great mercy, and expressing her gratitude to 
all around. She took her husband's hand, 
and said, " My dear, the Lord has been very 
kind to us : O he is good, he is good ! But 
I'll tell you more by and by." In a few min- 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 37 

utes her whole frame was thrown into a state 
of agitation and agony. After a severe 
struggle for fifteen minutes, bathed with a 
clammy sweat, she laid her head on his 
bosom, and said, " I am going.'' Subduing 
his alarm, " Is Jesus precious ? " he asked. 
" Yes : O yes ! " she replied. He added, " My 
dearest love, I know Jesus Christ has long 
been your all in all. Can you now tell us he 
is so?" "I can — he is — yes — but I am 
not able to speak ! " He again said, "O my 
dearest, it is enough ! " She then attempted 
to lift up her face to his, and kissed him with 
her quivering lips and latest breath. She 
died in 1794, aged thirty-nine years, during 
twenty of which she had continually walked 
with God in white. 

Some time before this, she said to Mr. 
Rogers, " I feel myself very poorly in body, 
and several symptoms threaten my dissolution, 
but my soul is kept in perfect peace. It 
seems as though the Lord was preparing me 
for himself, and yet when I think of leaving 
the dearest of earthly comforts, it is like 
rending of self from self, of nature from na- 
ture, and of flesh from bone ! Neverthe- 
less, when I reflect that the separation is 



I38 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

only for a moment, compared with eter- 
nity, and that death itself cannot disunite 
our spirits, it greatly helps me to say, ' Lord, 
not as I will, but as thou wilt/ " 

Hear Mr. Rogers give his own experience 
on this supremely trying occasion : — 

I am conscious the tenderest of maternal 
ties possessed the heart of my dear com- 
panion ; yet these, when it came to the point, 
were dissolved with comparative ease ! as 
were, also, all her other friendly attachments 
— with one only exception, of myself. 

" Not even in death her friendship dies ! 
With grateful pity and surprise 

I ask, how can it be ? 
Loosen'd from all she leaves behind, 

Yet still — she cleaves to me. 
"On me she rests her dying head, 
And catching, grasps a broken reed, 

But will not let me part : 
Till Jesus visits her again, 
By nobler love dissolves the chain, 

And frees her struggling heart." 

God alone can tell you what I felt in that 
dread moment, when the Lord gave the sig- 
nal for dismission, and I was called to return 
the last parting kiss ! For some time I could 
only breathe, as it were, in silent accents, 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 39 

"O! my God, let my latter end be like hers ! 
Come, O come quickly, and prepare me to 
follow her." It is still the language of my 
bleeding heart, — 

" O let me on her image dwell, 
The soul-transporting spectacle, 

On whom even angels gaze ! 
A pious saint matured for God, 
And shaking off her earthly clod, 

To see his open face. 

" I see the generous friend sincere ! 
Her voice still vibrates in my ear, 

The voice of truth and love J 
It calls me to put off my clay, 
And bids me soar with her away 

To fairer worlds above ! " 

Well ! thank God, a moment cannot always 
last ! And 

" He who set my partner free, 
Shall quickly send for you and me ! " 
Birmingham, England, March 29, 1795. 

This was a little more than four years after 
Mr. Wesley passed into the skies. 

" O may we triumph so, 

When all our warfare's past, 
And dying, find our latest foe 
Under our feet at last." 



140 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

Reader, reflect on this precious life and 
glorious religious experience and precious 
death, and ask thyself if thou hast the same 
spirit of entire consecration, the same hallowed 
holy fire glowing in thy breast, the same 
heavenly meetness for immortality. O con- 
secrate thy living powers fully to the living 
God, and 

" Live the life of heaven above, 
All the life of glorious love." 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. I4I 



CHAPTER XII. 

MORE OF HER SPIRITUAL LETTERS. 

The rich qualities of this devoted lady are 
beautifully set forth in the many excellent 
letters that she wrote to so many of her 
friends on so many topics. They *are all 
spiritual in their tone and tendency. 

These letters will be of unspeakable profit 
to the reader, as they are full of instruction 
on many practical and experimental matters. 

Letter to Mrs. Bourn. 

Macclesfield, Nov. 15, 1778. 

My Dear Sister, — Your letter caused 
great thanksgiving to God on your account ; 
all glory be to him who hath increased your 
desires after holiness. Fear not, you will 
surely attain if you follow on. That lovely 
Lamb that bled on Calvary was slain " to re- 
deem us from all iniquity." O look to him : 
behold the glory of God ! See the God of 



142 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

angels ; O look at his precious bleeding side ; 
his hands, his head, his feet ! Behold him 
gasping, groaning, dying, that you might be 
made clean ! " Without holiness no man 
shall see the Lord/' But, glory to his name, 
whoever steps into that fountain, which is 
expressly said to be for sin and for uncleanli- 
ness, shall be made perfectly whole. O let 
your faith venture in ! wash and be clean : — 

" Sink into the purple flood, 
Rise to all the life of God." 
I 
Open, my dear sister, open your willing, 
longing heart, and the King of glory will 
come in. And then be assured, " all evil be- 
fore his presence shall fly." Sin cannot 
remain where Jesus fully dwells : for he is 
holiness, and where he fills the soul, he leaves 
no room for any other guest. Whenever you 
can say, Jesus, thou art my all, and I love my 
God the present moment, with all my loving 
heart, you that moment possess the blessing 
of sanctification, and never need to lose it 
more. It is retained, as well as received, by 
simple faith. We can have no stock of grace 
on hand, but live moment by moment ; hang- 
ing and depending on the adorable Jesus. In 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. I43 

him there is a full supply of all we want, or 
can want. 

This, blessed be God, I prove, and that 
continually. Every hour, every moment, 
brings me fresh delight in God. He is an 
inexhaustible fountain of love : — 

" Insatiate to this spring I fly, 
I drink, and yet am ever dry." 

I cannot express the sweet union I feel 
with my God at this moment. 

" My Jesus to know, and feel his blood flow, 
'Tis life everlasting, 'tis heaven below." 

I am much blessed when I remember my 
dear friend at the throne of grace ; and often 
do I beseech my blessed Lord to 

" Fill her with all the life of love, 
In mystic union join 
Her to thyself, and let her prove 
The fellowship divine." 

Jesus is unspeakably precious while I write : 
may you catch the flame I feel : — 

" And when your cup with love runs o'er, 
O may sin never enter more." 

So prays, my dear sister, yours in divine 
bonds, H. A. ROE. 



144 L1FE AND JOURNAL OF 

Letter to Miss R. y before she received sanctification. 
Macclesfield, Nov. 21, 1778. 

Last Thursday evening, I was pleasingly 
surprised by a letter from my dear Miss R., 
who, I sometimes feared, had forgot all her 
purposes and promises ; and also all the bless- 
ings she so often received when we met in 
our Lord's name. I was glad to find my fears 
groundless ; but much more pleased and thank- 
ful was I to find, by the contents of your last, 
that your precious soul was still laboring up 
the hill of holiness : go on and prosper. 
Many are the trials we meet with in the way : 
yea, our Lord hath foretold us, that in the 
world we should have tribulation, but in him 
peace. 

I hope you enjoy a sense, yea, a clear sense, 
of pardon at the worst of times. This is 
your privilege, and I am thankful you discern 
such beauty in holiness. O how sweet are 
those words : " Without holiness no man 
shall see the Lord. ,, You have cause to praise 
God for the knowledge he has given you of 
your nature's depravity. It is very good and 
profitable to know our sinful tendencies. O ! 
my dear, be very watchful against little things, 
and " keep thy heart with all diligence ; for 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. I45 

out of it are the issues of life." Let God 
have your first thoughts : let him be first in 
your affections ; so shall your words and 
works please him. 

Daily entreat him to take away all opposi- 
tion that remains in your will, to his provi- 
dential order : so shall you find rest in those 
circumstances, which otherwise would give 
you much uneasiness. The meditations of 
your heart leading to him ; the affections of 
your soul cleaving to Jesus ; your will sinking 
into his will : here is the rest of the saints ! 
while all that is within you calls your Jesus 
King. " Whatever ye ask in my name," 
saith our adorable Redeemer, "you shall 
receive." Ask, then, my dear friend, for a 
greater power of faith ; for, as you believe, so 
will you increase in every grace of his Spirit ; 
and your soul will more and more centre in 
God, till you become one spirit with him, who 
is the life of all living ; yea, the very essence 
of heaven itself ! 

" To his meritorious passion 
All our happiness we owe ; 
Pardon, uttermost salvation, 

Heaven above, and heaven below. 

Grace and glory 
From that open fountain flow." 



I46 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

To the care and love of our almighty 
Jesus I commend you : O may his face al- 
ways shine upon you, and his blessed, loving 
Spirit fill your soul ! Pray much, and you 
shall attain all the salvation you desire. I 
am yours in bonds of divine love, 

H. A. ROE. 
Letter to Mr. Robert Roe. 

Nantwich, April 20, 1779. 

Dear Cousin, — You are quite mistaken — 
you do not try my patience at all ; but you 
are made a means of humbling my soul be- 
fore God, when you think me capable of 
answering in a proper manner the questions 
you ask : and yet, as far as the Lord has 
taught me, I am willing to communicate. I 
believe your eye is single ; you are a child of 
God, and an heir of glory. For you the Father 
gave his only Son : Jesus the Saviour bled 
for you: and the blessed Spirit hath applied 
the blood of sprinkling to the pardon of your 
sins, and the comfort of your soul in all your 
various trials. I account it no strange thing 
that you should be assaulted like your heav- 
enly Master ; yet surely you will not give 
way to reasoning, because Satan accosts you 
as he did the incarnate . God. No : rather 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. I47 

take comfort, for he that had no sin was 
tempted in this very point, like as you are. 
A hypocrite may boast he is never tempted ; 
has no doubts or fears ; but a child of God 
(some rare cases excepted) is seldom long 
together unassaulted by our vigilant adver- 
sary, who takes every possible method and 
opportunity to attack our confidence in the 
Lord, and to work upon all that remains of 
the carnal mind, or of unbelief: but he can 
only tempt ; he cannot force us to give way 
either to sin or unbelief. Neither think it 
strange that you are not inwardly as holy as 
you ought to be : every child of God feels 
the same, till fully renewed in love by the 
power of the Holy Ghost. Till then he has 
faith ; but it is often mixed with unbelief : 
he has love ; but though he loves God above 
all things, yet the love of self and of creature 
comforts often steals in. He has a blessed 
measure of true humility ; and yet he is con- 
strained to acknowledge frequently with tears, 

" Cursed pride, that busy sin, 
Spoils all that I perform." 

His patience and resignation are not perfect : 
his will is not fully subdued to God at all 



I48 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

times, nor his affections and desires wholly 
spiritual. The Spirit of God does visit, but 
does not dwell ; does, at times, almost fill the 
soul with delight, thereby wooing it to cast 
away unbelief, and open the door to receive 
all the precious mind of Jesus — all the stamp 
of love divine. Now when a soul is obedient 
to the voice of God, when it does open the 
door, and grasp the promises of holiness in 
the hand of faith, he will come into that soul, 
and plant his own nature there. Then, when 
perfected in love, faith becomes constant, and 
unmixed with unbelief. Love takes full 
possession of the soul, and humility, un- 
mixed with pride, lays him at the Saviour's 
feet. His constant faith and perfect love 
now bring forth perfect patience and resigna- 
tion. His deep-rooted humility having laid 
all self at the Saviour's feet, his will is now 
quite subject, and all his language is, 

" All's alike to me, so I 
In my Lord may live and die." 

But even this state is consistent with much 
ignorance, many weaknesses and infirmities; 
with many temptations, trials, crosses, and 
bodily afflictions ; and, on account of these, 
our joy may at times be small : yet our faith 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. I49 

may be perfect, and our peace undisturbed. 
I believe our faith is often made manifest by 
following God blindfold (if I may be allowed 
the expression) ; I mean when our ignorance 
and blindness cannot account for his provi- 
dential dispensations ; when we are beset 
with trials, and see no way to escape. In 
this case, faith says, " It is the Lord, let him 
do what seemeth to him good." Being con- 
fident of this one thing, " What I know not 
now, I shall know hereafter ; " I will trust in 
my God, and not be afraid, for he is my all.. 
I have not time, room, or expression to tell 
a thousandth part of the goodness of my 
God to my soul. He is ever with me, and 
assures my heart, " All that I have is thine." 
All my desires are satisfied in him : I live in 
him, and walk in him, and he is my God. 
He is with me in sickness and in health — at 
home and abroad — in public and in private. 
In reading or writing I feel his presence : and 
O ! when I am bowed before his throne, he 
lets down a heaven of bliss ! Language fails 
when I speak of his love. O may my every 
breath speak his praise ! I remain your 
unworthy friend, but happy sister, 

H. A. ROE. 



150 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

Letter to Miss Salmon, 

M alp as, June 16, 1779. 

My Dear Friend, — How shall I praise 
my God for his goodness, his infinite, his 
stupendous love ! O how he heaps his bene- 
fits upon me, and makes every other blessing 
sweet, by the gift of himself ! Would any- 
thing the world calls great or good be any- 
thing to me without my God ! Ah ! no, no : 
everything most desirable is hateful to my 
soul, wherein I cannot taste, or feel, or see 
something of my blessed Lord : but, all glory 
be to him, he is my all in all things. Help 
me to love this only lovely, dearest object of 
my wishes. Let him, my dear sister, be our 
Lord and King for ever. Yes, Lord, take our 
hearts : — 

" Manage the wheels by thy command, 
And govern every spring." 

How sweet is the yoke of Jesus ! O how 
gentle, how tender, how compassionate his 
care ! How hath he borne you and I, as weak 
and helpless lambs in his arms, carried us in 
his bosom, and defended us from the power 
of the enemy ! Eternal Lord God, thou in- 
dwelling Trinity, whom truly our hearts do 
love, accept the gratitude words cannot 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 5 I 

speak : in silent adoration we adore thee, 
overwhelmed at thy amazing grace ! I cannot 
utter, my dear friend, the sweet feelings of 
my heart, or tell you how divine a union my 
spirit feels with yours. O may you now, and 
henceforth, prove all that Jesus can bestow ! 
How much is that ? Words cannot tell you ; 
but yours it is, through the merit of his 
blood! 

I intended to begin my letter with thanks 
for your love and kindness to me at Chester ; 
but I was led to the precious fountain of all 
comfort, and when I had once begun his 
mercy's theme, I could not break off ! I bear, 
however, a grateful sense of the affectionate 
regard you manifested ; and though to tell 
you so is all I can do, my Lord will surely 
reward. My love to dear Miss Bennett, and 
all that family ; and to all where you are. I 
bear them all on my heart before God. I 
love them all ; and if they knew how Jesus 
loves them, they would not keep back their 
hearts from him. I got safe to this place, 
and am treated very kindly by this loving 
family ; but O how I feel for those who love 
not God ! My dear Miss B. is as open and 
free as before. My soul cleaves to her, and I 



152 LIFE AXD JOURNAL OF 

have great hopes. Pray for her, and for your 
ever affectionate, h. a. roe. 

Letter to Miss Loxdale. 

Nantwich, June 30, 1779. 

Dear Sister, — My dear friend's letter 
was indeed a pleasure and a blessing to me ; 
and my Lord's great goodness to you is a 
fresh motive to love and praise him. But 
fresh motives of this kind are no new things 
to me ; I am ever discovering instances of 
his goodness that fill me with wonder and 
astonishment, and cause me to exclaim, with 
holy David, " Lord, what is man, that thou 
art mindful of him?" Great things, indeed, 
my dear sister, hath the Lord done for you, 
and for your unworthy friend : and yet, O 
stupendous grace ! we have only received a 
drop from the ocean of his love : an endless 
prospect and a maze of bliss lie yet before 
us ! opening beauties, and such lengths, and 
breadths, and depths, and heights, as thought 
cannot reach, or mind of man conceive ! It 
is, my friend, the fulness of the triune God, in 
which we may bathe, and plunge, and sink, till 
lost and swallowed up in the ever-increasing, 
overflowing ocean of delights. His fulness ; 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 53 

(Xwhat is it ! Shall we ever fathom it ? ever 
know a ten thousandth part of that efful- 
gence we could not bear to know and live ! 
Nay, and when disembodied through the re- 
volving ages of eternity, I am persuaded we 
shall only seem beginning to know his fulness 
of love. What thoughts are these! when I 
enter into them, as into a labyrinth, they al- 
most overcome my natural powers. O how 
very little of his revealed glory can this 
earthen vessel contain ! but a time is hasten- 
ing on (and I eagerly wait for its approach), 
when, no longer imprisoned in clay, our eyes 
shall be strengthened to see him as he is ; — 
see him for ourselves, and bask forever in his 
smiles. Yes, we shall be with Jesus, and be- 
hold his glory. He will reveal to us, also, as 
much as we bear, of the fulness of the 
Father's glory : and we shall be with Father, 
Son, and Spirit, filled to all eternity ! But I 
have been led further than I intended : I 
must return. 

Permit me to ask, my dear friend, what are 
your ideas, what is your opinion, or what 
your experience of inward, instantaneous 
sanctification ; whereby the root, the in-being 
of sin is destroyed ? I do not mean to allude 



154 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

to a state of angelic or Adamic, but a Chris- 
tian perfection ; a destruction of every tem- 
per contrary to love ; a state consistent with 
many temptations of the devil, if our hearts 
repel those temptations, and our will do not 
embrace or yield to them : for that cannot 
be sin in which our will has no part. Thus 
it was with Jesus : " In him was no sin, yet 
he was tempted in all points as .we are:" 
before his pure eyes did that enemy display 
all the kingdoms of the world, and the glory 
of them : to his spotless soul he suggested 
disturbing doubts, and presumptuous expecta- 
tions ; but in the Son of God they found no 
place. Again ; what I mean is a state con- 
sistent with a growth in grace ; for Jesus, 
though always pure, " increased in wisdom 
and stature, and in favor with God and man." 
Is not such a state expressed and described 
in the thirteenth of the first book of Corinth- 
ians ? and is it not commanded in these 
gracious words, " Rejoice evermore, pray 
without ceasing, and in everything give 
thanks ? " Does the apostle add, " This is 
the will of God concerning you ? " And 
after praying, " Now the God of peace sanc- 
tify you wholly : " does he not pray that 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 55 

" your whole spirit, soul, and body (after they 
are so sanctified), may be preserved blameless 
to the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ ? " 
Then follows the glorious promise, " Faithful 
is he that calleth you, who also will do it." 
And is not the same thing promised in the 
sweet passage you named : " I will sprinkle 
clean water upon you, and you shall be clean : 
from all your filthiness, and from all your 
idols will I cleanse you ? " etc. And again, 
did he not "swear to our father Abraham, 
that he would grant unto us, that we, being de- 
livered out of the hands of our enemies, might 
serve him without fear, in holiness and right- 
eousness before him all the days of our life ? " 
By the state I weakly attempt to describe, I 
mean that degree of humble love which ex- 
cludes every temper contrary thereto ; and 
faith that excludes the remains of unbelief, 
and every tormenting fear; "for he that 
feareth is not made perfect in love." It is 
"fellowship with the Father, and with his 
Son Jesus Christ," through the Spirit, by 
whose abiding witness we can say, "Abba, 
Father- — my Lord and my God," with an 
unwavering tongue. 

I know this precious gospel salvation is 



156 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

even derided by some, and exploded by many. 
Perhaps you may have conversed with some 
of these ; and not have met with many who 
have dared to speak for God in this respect. 
Some of my expressions may therefore ap- 
pear odd or unusual ; but, compare them with 
Scripture, and mention with freedom any of 
them you wish me to explain. As I know 
your situation, you will excuse the liberty I 
take in advising you not to meddle with 
opinions : this will insensibly eat out of the 
soul the precious life of God. Dispute not 
with any ; or, if they seek doubtful disputa- 
tions, it is a good way to propose prayer. But 
it may be well, as much as can be, to avoid 
the company of those who love vain contro- 
versy. Endeavor to possess a calm, recol- 
lected spirit — a heartfelt union with a holy 
God. Sweet truth — God is love and love is 
the Christian's all. Love in us is his nature 
imparted : it is the fulfilling of the law, the 
perfect law of liberty. Whosoever " loveth 
his brother,' ' hath fulfilled the law to his 
neighbor : and he who " loveth the Lord his 
God with all his heart, and soul, and mind, 
and strength," hath fulfilled the law to him 
also. To such " his commandments are not 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 57 

grievous ; " not a task, a wearisome burden, 
but a delight : " They are ways of pleasant- 
ness — they are paths of peace." And as we 
are under a law of love to God, so God, our 
God in Christ, is under a covenant of love, in 
which is made over to us all he is and all he has 
to give ; his every attribute ; his wisdom to 
guide and teach ; his power to protect and 
help, and strengthen : his faithfulness, his 
truth, his mercy, etc., all sealed over, and 
secured by covenant promises and covenant 
blood. 

my dear sister, what a blessed portion is 
ours ! Let us determine to prove it all. We 
may, I trust we shall, and together praise in 
endless day the great Three-One. I am ever 
yours in him, h. a. roe. 

Letter to the same. 

Macclesfield, Aug. 4, 1775. 

1 thank you, my dear sister, for your last, 
and would have written sooner, but a violent 
rheumatic pain in my head prevented me. I 
clearly see in your experience a deepening of 
the work of God. He is preparing your heart 
for his perfect love : he is emptying you of 
self that you may be swallowed up in him : he 



I58 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

is crucifying you to the world, that you may 
live to him, and for him alone : he discovers 
to you the beauties of holiness, that your soul 
and all its powers may be captivated thereby, 
and enlarged to ask and receive all his good- 
ness waits to give. It is no marvel that 
Satan shoots his fiery darts, and employs his 
strongest batteries to prevent this work of 
grace : he ever did, and he ever will. This 
precious salvation entirely overturns his king- 
dom in the believer's heart ; he hath no more 
peace, no more power ; he finds no inward 
evil now (in those thus saved) to close in with 
his temptations. His every dart is now re- 
pelled ; quick-sighted love discovers all his 
snares, and, anmed with the strength of Om- 
nipotence, we more than conquer ! 

The temptations you find are the same I 
was followed with, when the fountains of the 
great deep of inbred corruption were discov- 
ered to my view : yes, I experienced them all, 
and ten times more. 

Mr. Fletcher's Polemical Essay, especially 
in his address to imperfect believers, seeking 
Christian perfection, was made a great bless- 
ing to me. This, with Mr. Wesley's Plain 
Account, answered every objection, every 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 59 

doubt : and I earnestly recommend them to 
your serious perusal. These will lead you to 
see we are sanctified, as well as justified, by 

faith alone, and not for our merits, fitness, or 
deservings ; but faith lays hold of the blood of 
Christ, as the procuring cause of our holiness, 
and which alone cleanseth from all sin. This 
blood is all-sufficient : — as prevailing now as 
ever it will be. What then does the believer 
(hungering and thirsting after righteousness, 
or inward purity) wait for ? The promise is, 
They shall be filled. Why delay ? We may 
come just as we are ; and if so, we may come 
this moment. It is said, Acts xxvi, 18, " We are 
sanctified by faith in Jesus : " and the work in 
that verse is plainly distinguished from justi- 
fication, or the forgiveness of sins, both being 
there clearly promised. If then it be by faith 
alone, it must be also instantaneous, in the 
same manner as our pardon was. Did we 
not receive the one in a moment, by, and in 
the act of believing? And why should we 
stumble at coming the same way for the 
other? " By grace are ye saved through 

• faith," in all the different degrees of that sal- 
vation which we can receive in the body. If 
by grace, then it is no more of works, and if 



l60 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

not by works, we need wait for none : — we 
may come just as we are, yea, just now. 

May the Lord, while you read these lines, 
open the windows of heaven, and fill your 
spirit with his pure love. Do you thirst ? 
Behold rivers of living waters gushing out of 
your Redeemer's wounds, — water that will 
wash your inbred sin away. Is not the Holy 
Ghost waiting to apply the efficacious blood, 
and make you white as snow ? Hovers he 
not over you ? Knocks he not even now at 
the door of your heart ? O let your inmost 
spirit cry, 

" Come in, come in, thou heavenly guest, 
Nor ever hence remove ; 
But sup with me, and let the feast 
Be everlasting love." 

Amen, Lord Jesus, answer the prayer of 
thy child. Be it unto her as her soul desir- 
eth ; fill her heart, and fill it now. I feel for 
the trials of your present situation, but the 
sweet love of Jesus shall bear you above all. 
Take no thought for the morrow, but mo- 
mentarily live to God, and for God, and noth- 
ing will be able to harm you. I am, my dear 
friend, yours in the best of bonds, 

H. A. ROE. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. l6l 

Letter to Mr. Robert Roe, tipon the nature of faith, 
and in what sense it is the act of man. 

Macclesfield, Aug. 12, 1779. 

Dear Cousin, — I can still see all your 
doubts and scruples in no other light than as 
temptations and suggestions from an enemy, 
who is, and ever will be, watching and en- 
deavoring to break your peace. And though 
I believe you will be brought through them 
all to the haven of bliss, yet you permit him 
to rob you of much comfort which you might 
enjoy; and he would rather employ you in 
answering his lying suggestions, than that 
you should be momentarily looking up to and 
depending on Jesus for all you want. For 
my own part, if it were not to answer your 
queries, I should never enter into the nice 
distinctions you do. I have much more to 
learn myself, and am convinced many would 
solve your scruples much better than I can. 
Indeed, to speak properly, no one can do it : 
it is the work of God. Yet, I am ready 
to impart what himself hath freely given. 
But I beseech you to read my letters with 
prayer, and beg of God that he will attend 
every observation with the light and blessing 
of his Spirit. 



1 62 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

You say, " The work of justification is 

greatly obscured by many, and you do not 
dude rue. — that I tell you, sometimes it is 
by faith, sometimes by works." So do St. 
Paul and St. Tames, yet they are strictly con- 
sist r::t with themselves and each other. But 
I sometimes think you understand by works 
a meritorious condition ; I never mean any 
such thing. When I speak of the works God 
requires in a seeker or believer. I only mean 
a co-operation with, or using the grace given 
to us. I believe God the Father loved all 
mankind in their sins, freely and uncondition- 
ally, or he had never given his only begotten 
Son. And it was an unconditional promise, 
"The seed of the woman shall bruise the 
serpent's head." God the Son also loved us 
freely and unconditionally, when he left his 
Father's glorv. and became man ; — lived, died, 
and rose again/*?;- us. I believe, too, God the 
Holv Ghost, unconditionally (with respect to 
anything we can do), '''enlightens every man 
that cometh into the world.'' But then, these 
things being done for us, by and through the 
free grace of the eternal Trinity, we are re- 
red to use the light given. 
If the Spirit of God convinceth of sin, 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 63 

which is his work, we are required to forsake 
it ; and there is always power to do it com- 
municated. This forsaking of sin is an act 
of man, and a condition ; for, " put away the 
evil of your doings," saith God, "from among 
you, and cease to do evil :" yet this is not a 
meritorious work. Again : if the Spirit 
point the guilty, heavy-laden sinner to the 
Lamb of God, show the all-sufficiency of his 
atonement, and that the promises are made 
to such lost sinners as he is, who are weary 
of the burden of sin; that he has a 
right to come, because all are invited ; and 
that "now is the accepted time" with God, 
"and now is the day of salvation;" — that 
no price, no worthiness, is required ; but he 
may come without money, and be forgiven 
freely ; — when these things are revealed by 
God, which is his work, then it is that we are 
commanded to act faith. We are to believe 
the record true ; embrace it, rely upon it, and 
venture our guilty souls on the promises 
made through a bleeding Saviour. It is after 
this act of faith, not before it, God gives the 
witness of the Spirit. Do you understand 
me ? The witness, or the seal of the Spirit, 
is God's gift, not our act ; given to all who 



164 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

do act faith on Jesus, and the promise made 
through him. But it is not given till faith be 
acted. If we, as penitents, had no power 
thus to act faith, how would God be just in 
declaring, " He that believeth not shall be 
damned " ? 

With respect to works after justification, 
can any one retain his confidence in God 
without them ? Has he any foundation in 
the Scripture to do so ? God absolutely re- 
quires that we should do, do, do (as you say,), 
and be, be, be : not in a meritorious sense, 
but as fruits of the law of love, written in 
our hearts, acceptable and well pleasing 
through Jesus Christ, and with every injunc- 
tion he gives power to perform it. The 
power given is of grace, and the use of that 
power is the act of man. Again : When the 
Lord, by his Spirit, reveals our inbred sin, 
and points us to the all-cleansing blood, and 
to the promises to circumcise our heart, etc., 
it is his work wrought in us freely. But, 
when this light is given, we are to embrace 
the promises, and act faith upon them. God 
hath said, "I will do it.'' Let me ask, Do 
you believe he will do it in you ? Hold fast 
that faith, then, for the promise is sure, it 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 65 

cannot fail : and God's time is now. Only 
believe. God at this moment requires an act 
of faith in you. He holds out the promise, 
and bids you believe. But you will say, I do 
not feel the blessing. Poor Thomas I Be- 
cause thou hast not seen, thou wilt not be- 
lieve. " Blessed are they who have not seen, 
and yet have believed ! " But you ask, 
"What must I believe?'' I answer, That 
God is faithful — that he can and will, in a 
moment, give you what now you do not feel : 
nay, you will not feel it till after you have 
believed. If I had given you an apple, it 
would not be faith to believe I had given it : 
but, if I had promised to give you one, and to 
give it you instantly on your requesting it ; if 
you then believed my promise, and took me 
at my word, though you did not see or handle 
the apple, this would be your act of faith in 
me. But how much more immutable the 
promise of a God ! You cannot believe him 
in vain. Even suppose (which is seldom the 
case) you thus act faith a day or two, or 
longer, before you receive the witness, shall 
you be the worse for it ? Nay, but far better 
for having believed : this faith will bring 
power into your soul, and you will sensibly 



1 66 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

feel what you never felt before ;' and soon 
you will prove the Spirit's inward testimony, 
that it is done unto you according to your 
faith. But you will say, " How is the work 
instantaneous, if I must wait a day or two ? " 
I answer, The work is done the moment you 
believe : though the witness of the spirit 
(which is not your faith, but the gift of God) 
be not fully given till afterward. " He that 
believeth" (the promise saith) " shall be 
saved' ' — from guilt, from inbred sin, and into 
glory. 

It appears to me you labor under another 
mistake. You expect, in being saved from 
sin, to be also delivered from temptation, 
shortcomings, weaknesses, and infirmities ; 
but these are inseparable from humanity. 
We shall never have a perfect body till the 
resurrection : of consequence, shall be liable 
to a thousand infirmities. We shall never 
have perfect knowledge in this life ; and shall 
therefore ever be liable to errors in judgment", 
etc. The perfect law of Adam would con- 
demn these things : but we are under the 
covenant of grace ; or, in other words, under 
the law of love to Christ, whose blood every 
moment pleads for these things. May the 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 167 

God of peace and love teach and guide you 
into his perfect will, prays your affectionate 
cousin, H. A. ROE. 

Letter to the Rev. J. Wesley. 

Macclesfield, Oct. 15, 1779. 

Rev. Sir, — Since I received your last I 
have had a return of the pain in my side, an 
oppression of my lungs, and sometimes (which 
I never had before) such a yellowness of skin 
that I apprehended my disorder would turn to 
the jaundice. After eating and drinking, I 
was thrown into violent heats, and afterwards 
into cold, fainting sweats. Then I was either 
in great pain at my stomach, or else so 
sleepy, that I could not keep my eyes open 
for a considerable time. But, blessed be 
God ! I found it a sweet affliction ; for never 
did I find Christ so precious ; my evidence so 
clear ; my will so unreservedly swallowed up 
in his, nor the intercourse so truly opened 
between him and my believing soul. Hence 
I loved, and praised him for every pain ; and, 
had it been his adorable will to have called 
me hence, how gladly should I have obeyed 
the joyful summons, and hasted to the pres- 
ence of my beloved, my friend, my all ! But 



1 68 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

seeing he still spares me a little longer; { 
embrace his will and bless the merciful hand 
which brought me down, and hath raised me 
up again. I see an open field, a boundless 
prospect of new delights lies open before me. 
I see and feel that God hath engaged all his 
attributes in my behalf ; and in his strength I 
fear no cross, no shame, no enemies ; for my 
Leader, my Captain, my King, is the Lord of 
hosts. His glory is my only aim, and my 
only happiness. O precious thought ! O 
bliss not imaginary, but real ; not fading, but 
everlasting ; not decreasing, but ever grow- 
ing ! O vast abyss of unfathomable love ! 
And as this is my portion, so, dear sir, it is 
yours also. We experience it now, and shall 
for ever know it. On these accounts, how 
easy is the sight of faith ! how delightful the 
labors of love ! and how welcome the cross 
we bear for Him, who is our life, our strength 
and our salvation ! 

Dear Mr. S. is still unable to go into his 
circuit, and I fear he will never be much bet- 
ter. Cold bathing seems to do him most 
good ; but he is very ill, especially in the 
mornings. His grief at not being able to 
travel is, I believe, a great hindrance to his 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 169 

recovery. My soul feels great nearness to 
him ; for I believe he is, in a peculiar sense, 
beloved of God, and a faithful steward of his 
grace. 

I hope, sir, you will remember him at the 
throne of grace, and that God may either re- 
store him to his former usefulness, or else 
help him to be perfectly resigned to his ador- 
able will ; for you know, dear sir, that to 
have a soul, all on fire for doing good, kept 
back and hindered by sickness, weakness, or 
other bodily infirmity, must be a great temp- 
tation to the contrarv. But as there are 
none so weak as myself, and, of consequence, 
who stand more in need of divine assistance, 
I hope you will not cease to mention me in 
your prayers. In so doing you will greatly 
oblige, rev. sir, your very unworthy, but 
most affectionate friend and servant, 

H. A. ROE. 

Letter to the same. 

December ti, 1779. 

Rev. and Dear Sir, — I should not have 
been silent thus long, had not my dearest 
Lord seen good to afflict my body. I am just 
recovering from a sore throat. It was not 



I70 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

ulcerated, but attended with a fever. Num- 
bers in this town, or neighborhood, have been 
ill, and several have died, four in one family 
within a month. I applied hartshorn to my 
throat, and found benefit from it. I am now, 
I bless God, much better. I have reason to 
praise him for every affliction ; for all he 
permits does work together for my good. I 
do love my Lord with all my heart. 

" All my capacious powers can wish, 
In him doth richly meet ; 
Nor to my eyes is light so dear, 
Or friendship half so sweet." 

No, no, all that the creation can boast of 
is poor and mean compared with him I love. 
In him I feel a constant heaven, and my soul 
truly sits loose to all besides. I have victory, 
through his grace, over all things, inward 
and outward, that are contrary to his will. I 
have at times various temptations ; but they 
find no place in me, nor at any time distress 
or bring me into bondage. I have (glory be 
to God) the inward testimony of his Spirit, 
that I please him, and that he dwelleth in 
me. My body and soul are both the Lord's ; 
and I earnestly desire that his whole will may 
be done in me and by me. I am a sacrifice 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. I/I 

offered up through Jesus, my adorable High 
Priest ; and am determined, through grace 
divine, ever to remain so. I am a pilgrim 
in a strange country, and all my treasure is 
above. 

I am travelling as fast as the wings of time 
will bear me forward to my celestial country ; 
though thorns, and snares, and gins, some- 
times beset my path ; yet my feet are shod, 
my sandals on, and I trample on them. 
Though the arrows of the archer are flying, I 
have a shield that turns aside the fiery darts. 
I have a shadow from the heat, and a refuge 
from the storm. I live upon the food of 
angels, and drink largely of the fountain of 
the water of life. His ways are ways of pleas- 
antness, and all his paths are perfect peace. 
How great is the love wherewith he hath 
loved me ! O how large his grace to the 
most unworthy ! " Bless the Lord, O my 
soul, and all that is within me bless his holy 

name." I have heard from cousin J 

R , and his soul prospers ; blessed be 

God ! I hope, dear sir, you ever do, and ever 
will remember, at the throne of grace, your 
most unworthy, but truly affectionate child in 
a precious Jesus, h. a. roe. 



172 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

To the Rev. Mr. Fletcher. 

Dublin, Dec. 14, 1784. 

Rev. and Dear Sir, — I believe it will not ' 
be unacceptable to you to be informed how a 
God of love is blessing his dear people in this 
city. You have a peculiar right to expect 
this, because you were made, through mercy, 
the instrument of kindling a gracious flame 
in many hearts ; and of preparing others to 
receive the message of salvation ; a present sal- 
vation ; even from all sin. Had not you and 
your dear partner been here before us, it is 
probable we should not have been received 
as we now are. But the sound of your Mas- 
ter's feet was behind you, and a gracious 
savor was left upon the minds of the people 
in general ; so that when we came, we found 
them eager to embrace the whole gospel. I 
had the clearest assurance, before we left 
England, that our appointment for Dublin 
was of the Lord, and every day brings me 
fresh proofs of it. It was also a kind Provi- 
dence which brought us here on the very day 
that precious woman, Mrs. King (now Mrs. 
Johnson) was married : and in consequence 
of which went to reside at Lisburn. Had we 
arrived before the society suffered so great a 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 73 

loss, my poor services might not have been 
so acceptable : and had it been later, the 
minds of the people might have been grieved 
to excess. But the novelty of strangers first 
engaged their attention, and the word of the 
Lord soon became a sin-killing and soul-sav- 
ing word ; so that now every one's cares and 
fears terminate in a determination to secure 
his own salvation. 

Another great blessing is Mr. Rogers and 
Mr. Blair (his fellow-laborer) are united as the 
heart of one man. Mrs. Blair, also, is a sis- 
ter indeed to me in spirit and real affection. 
So that we are a family of love : and one 
small house serves us all.* And not the 
preachers only, but the stewards, leaders 
and people, all unite, and have only one strife 
— how they ^ may best promote each other's 
holiness and the cause of God. And glory, 
glory, glory, be ever ascribed to Father, Son 
and Holy Ghost, it is promoted. Sinners are 
snatched, by grace, as brands from the burn- 
ing, and the kingdom of God and his Christ 
is set up in many believing hearts. 

In six weeks from the time of our first 
arrival, many were awakened, and nine re- 
ceived a clear sense of pardon : these returned 



174 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

public thanks, which greatly encouraged the 
seekers, and raised the expectation of all. As 
it was manifestly a time of refreshing from 
the presence of the Lord, it was thought ex- 
pedient at our love-feast, October 10, to give 
notes of admission, on that occasion, to many 
who were not as yet members of society, but 
appeared desirous of salvation ; so that near 
seven hundred souls were present : and a 
feast of love it was, such as I believe many 
will praise God for to all eternity ! After 
several, who spoke with great freedom and 
simplicity, a poor penitent besought us with 
tears to pray for her. The kindlings of love 
which had been felt before, now became a 
flame in every believing soul ; and when fallen 
on our knees, the power of God descended of 
a truth : every corner of the house was filled 
with cries of " God be merciful to me a sin- 
ner,'' or " Praise the Lord, O my soul, who 
hath forgiven all my iniquities ! " Not one 
remained unaffected ; and we have since found 
that seven were justified at that time ; among 
whom was one that received a note of admit- 
tance in the morning, and several who came 
only with a faint desire, were deeply con- 
vinced of sin. The next night another was 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 75 

justified under the word, and a second under 
the prayer, and a backslider healed ; and soon 
after, while Mr. R explained and en- 
forced, " Blessed are the poor in spirit, for 
theirs is the kingdom of heaven ;" dear sister 
R , whom I am persuaded you well re- 
member (for you took great pains to encour- 
age and help her forward) ; even this poor 
nervous, afflicted woman, who has been a 
seeker twenty-one years, laid hold of the 
promise by faith, and received the " knowl- 
edge of salvation by the remission of sins;" 
and notwithstanding she is often greatly op- 
pressed by her bodily disorder, she is still en- 
abled to claim her interest in redeeming blood. 
A poor, vile young man, who had indulged 
himself in all kinds of sin with greediness, 
and, according to his own expression, " be- 
lieved no God more supreme than himself,' ' 
strayed into the chapel just as Mr. Rogers 
gave out the text, " Believe on the Lord Jesus 
Christ, and thou shalt be saved : " he was 
that hour cut to the heart, and is now ear- 
nestly seeking salvation, and has received 
much comfort. Under the same sermon one 
was justified, and another backslider healed. 
Since this, a man and his wife came to 



I76 LIFE AND JOURNAL OP 

preaching together, who had been seekers 
seven years, and their states nearly alike : they 
did not sit near each other ; but were both set 
at liberty under the same sentence, and in the 
same instant. They both ran to catch hold 

of Mr. R as he came from the pulpit, 

' and there met each other, and rejoiced to- 
gether with exceeding great joy. The man 
said, he knew his wife was blest before they 
thus met, as well as he knew that himself 
was. Another person who had been a back- 
slider ten years, first into Antinomian prin- 
ciples, and then into gross open sin, fell lately 
into deep despair, and many times attempted 
to put an end to his life, but was often pre- 
vented by an almost miraculous proivdence. 
Friday, Nov. 1 2, was the last time, when he 
had placed a loaded pistol to his breast, and 
intended to discharge it the next moment : 
but these words came with power, " Why will 
ye die ? " He instantly fell on his knees, and 
dropped the pistol. He came afterward to 
the preachers, who endeavored to encourage 
him ; and on the Tuesday following he was 
at our prayer meeting, where an agonizing 
spirit of prayer was given : he obtained then 
a comfortable hope of mercy, and at night, 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 77 

under Mr. Blair's preaching, was set at lib- 
erty. This he told me the next morning, with 
streaming eyes, and gratitude unspeakable. 

Nov. 1 8. We had another love-feast at 
Gravelwalk : it was a more wonderful season 
than even the former. We know of nine that 
we have reason to believe were justified ; 
and many lukewarm professors were greatly 
stirred up. Two of these found peace in the 
blood of Jesus the week after ; another on 
Sunday night last, who was a Papist ; and 
another last night. A Jew is also convinced 
and converted ; and from being, according to 
his sect, a Pharisee, is now zealous in his 
love to Jesus, though at the hazard of his life, 
for his own mother and other relations have 
attempted to murder him at different times. 

One of sister Johnson's classes, and an- 
other since formed, are committed to my 
care. In the first of *these are now thirty- 
eight members, in the latter thirty-six ; and 
within the last quarter, ten of these have re- 
ceived a sense of pardon, and four others are 
enabled to love God with all their hearts. I 
have likewise undertaken a class of young 
girls, from about nine to fourteen years of 
age. In a few weeks many of them began to 



IJ8 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

feel awakenings, and a few were deeply con- 
vinced of sin. A month ago, one of these, 
ten years of age, received a clear sense of par- 
don : she told her companion of the same 
age, who prayed and wept, and would not be 
comforted, till she obtained the same bless- 
ing, which was in a few days. When the rest 
heard this, they were greatly stirred up, and 
the following Sabbath two more were as 
clearly justified, one of eleven, the other thir- 
teen years of age. There is a great and vis- 
ible change in all these, and they speak 
clearly and experimentally. Seven more are 
under conviction, and I doubt not will soon 
be brought into liberty. In all, we have cer- 
tain accounts, since we came, of forty-six jus- 
tified, eight sanctified, and one hundred added 
to the society. 

As to myself, I never was so truly happy 
in every sense : happy in increasing union 
and communion with the Father, Son and 
Spirit, and sunk into depths of humble love. 
I feel my unworthiness and nothingness in- 
describable ; yet, stupendous grace ! all the 
communicable fulness of a triune God is mine. 
I feel the equal love of the undivided Deity. 
As I worship the Father, so I worship the Son 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 79 

and the Holy Ghost — my God — my all in all. 
I am happy, too, in one who is truly a help to 
me, both for soul and body, for time and eter- 
nity, and who greatly encourages me in all 
my labors : happy in my situation, among a 
lively, affectionate people, who make it their 
study how to manifest their love ; nor have 
we one jarring string among us. O may we 
ever be kept humble at the Saviour's feet, and 
all our blessings (as through grace they do) 
prove only a scale to heavenly love. Please 
to remember us, in the most affectionate 
manner, to dear Mrs. Fletcher. We entreat 
an interest in both your prayers. When I 
last asked this favor at Leeds, I believe you 
granted it, and that your petitions were an- 
swered. Once more, then, pray for us, and 
believe me, dear sir, in gospel love, your will- 
ing servant, h. a. Rogers. 

To Mr. Matthias Joyce. 

Dublin, May 1, 1785. 

Dear Brother, — My soul greatly rejoices 
in your joy. I do join with you in that song 
which shall never end, " Unto him that hath 
loved us, and washed us from our sins in his 
own blood, be glory for ever and ever." O 



180 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

how precious is that life of simple faith you 
describe and possess ! Go on, favored ser- 
vant of the Lord, and he will show you 
greater things than these. I do not mean 
there is anything greater or higher than 
love : but in this ocean, what heights, what 
lengths, what depths ! what immeasurable 
degrees, even in that communion with a 
triune God, which it is our privilege to prove. 
I know you feel something of what I mean, 
even of equal love of Father, Son and Holy 
Ghost. This we cannot properly feel till freed 
from inbred sin. Where sin remains, there 
cannot be that close union with the Father I 
now speak of : but sin destroyed, and we 
know the meaning of those words, " The 
Father himself loveth you : " and again, " I 
and my Father will come and make our abode 
with you." Yea, the whole Deity flows in 
upon us. Consider that blessed scripture, 
" Know ye not that your bodies are the tem- 
ples of the Holy Ghost, which is in you ; and 
ye are not your own, for ye are bought with 
a price?" By whom? By Jesus : therefore 
glorify God the Father ; even the triune God, 
— Father, Son, and Spirit, with your bodies 
and your spirits, which are his. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 151 

" Drawn, and redeem'd, and seal'd, 
We'll praise the One and Three, 
With Father, Son, and Spirit filPd 
To all eternity." 

I hope the Lord will carry on a gracious 
work in Drogheda. I am glad to hear you see 
so good a beginning. I never heard of so 
universal a revival, as I am told by many is 
now spreading through England, Ireland, and 
America ; and yet I think it is but the begin- 
ning of what the Lord will shortly do. Let 
us not be weak in faith, and we shall see 
showers of blessings. The promise shall 
surely be accomplished ; and perhaps hast- 
ened speedily by the universal cry of God's 
dear children : " The earth shall be filled with 
the knowledge of the glory of God, as the 
waters cover the sea." 

I doubt not but you have had a precious 
season with Mr. Wesley. I think I never 
saw him more truly filled with his blessed 
Master's Spirit. We have heard of two souls 
convinced of sin, and eight justified under 
him, while in Dublin ; and, blessed be God, 
two more, since he left us, can praise a recon- 
ciled God, and one is set at perfect liberty ; 
besides three more of the children, who have 



1 82 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

received remission of sins. I find, blessed be 
God, my own soul is as a watered garden ; 
and I have access to a spring, whose waters 
fail not, from which I ever drink fresh sup- 
plies. O what wells of salvation ! — what an 
unfathomable ocean of love ! 

A trifling affliction of body has, I think, 
sunk me deeper into God. Such heartfelt, 
solid peace, such inward nearness to, and fel- 
lowship with him, I have proved the last fort- 
night, as is better felt than described. It has 
been much of 

" That sacred awe which dares not move, 
And all the silent heaven of love." 

O for an enlarged heart ! O for ten thous- 
and tongues to praise my God ! As it is said, 
" In that day ye shall know that I am in the 
Father, you in me, and I in you : " so it is 
— the blessed day is come : I do know it : I 
do feel it. I know what it is to dwell in the 
Father, through the Son, and by the uniting 
power of the Holy Ghost, and ever worship 
an undivided Deity. These words have often 
been spoken to my heart, and I feel them now 
applied : " All that I have is thine : " yes, my 
Lord, and I possess a drop out of the ocean. 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 83 

If I had much more at present, it would lay 
me dead at thy feet : but all is mine in happy 
reversion, and what my weakness can bear, 
thou wilt impart. O make thyself room, and 
more of heaven bestow! Thou wilt, thou 
dost enlarge my heart. I grasp the God I 
seek, the God I love, the God I shall enjoy to 
all eternity ! O what a word is that ! A 
triune God my own to eternity ! Yes, yes, 
he is. Wonder, O heavens ! Be astonished, 
O earth ! Be humble, O my soul ; and help 
me to praise him, all ye hosts above ! O that 
all the world knew the riches of divine love ! 
O that all believers would give him all their 
heart ! 

My brother, let us covenant afresh with 
God, to spread the savor of his grace with all 
our most enlarged powers ; especially his full 
salvation, that rest from all sin, that rest of 
perfect love, received by simple faith, and by 
faith alone. I think I never read any thing 
wherein that blessing is more clearly described 
than Mr. Wesley's sermon in the March and 
April Magazines for this year, which I believe 
will do much good : for how many have been 
discouraged by not knowing and considering 
that one point, " Sin is a wilful transgression 



184 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

of a known law." If this were the constant 
rule by which we judged of what we feel, how 
many vain reasonings would be answered ; 
— how many subtle suggestions of the enemy ? 
A mistake through ignorance, or through an 
imperfect memory, together with various hate- 
ful injections from an enemy : a dulness of 
spirit, occasioned by the body ; or a flutter of 
spirit occasioned by surprise, etc. ; none of 
these, I say, or all of them put together, 
would then appear a sufficient reason why a 
soul should cast away its confidence respect- 
ing what the Lord has wrought. Seeing these 
are consistent with pure love, they are not 
wilful transgressions of a known law. 

May the Lord bless you in your soul and 
labors still more abundantly, prays, dear 
brother, your friend and sister in Jesus, 

H. A. ROGERS. 

Letter to the Rev. J. Wesley. 

November 21, 1782. 

My Dear and Honored Sir, — I have 
been much indisposed since I wrote last, but 
I think it is not wholly my old disorders. I 
believe since my cousin's death my nerves 
have been much affected, because any thing 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 85 

sudden will occasion tremors, which I can no 
otherwise account for, at the same time that 
my soul is in perfect peace and solidly happy ; 
as also many times there is a dulness and stu- 
pidity, when at the same moment I feel a direct 
witness that it proceeds not from any abate- 
ment of the ardors of love divine. Glory be to 
God, I feel this as a well of water ever spring- 
ing up afresh, and I know the work of his 
grace takes still deeper root than ever in my 
worthless heart ; and though at times the 
enemy suggests, if this nervous disorder takes 
hold of me, as on my late dear cousin, I shall 
not rejoice evermore, as I have done hitherto ; 
yet I am enabled to answer him, in the power 
of faith, " My strength shall be equal to my 
day." If he afflicts, I have his word of prom- 
ise, " My grace is sufficient for thee." Nor 
can I have one painful fear : I know in whom 
I trust. 

I was yesterday employed in visiting mem- 
bers of the classes with Mr. R. ; a business 
which has been much neglected here of late, 
and which, I trust, will be made a blessing to 
many. I find it profitable. Mr. R. has suf- 
fered much through the prejudices of some; 
but he is as gold purified in the fire : it has 



1 86 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

been an unspeakable blessing. It has cut off 
his intimacy with those who would perhaps 
have proved snares and hindrances to his 
soul and his labors ; and united him more 
closely to the little flock, who are rich in 
faith, and heirs of the kingdom. I believe 
he has acted faithfully to God, to souls, and 
to you. 

The select band is now the most precious 
meeting in which I ever assembled. There 
are forty-eight members, all truly and happily 
walking in the narrow path : thirty-five, I 
have no doubt, enjoy perfect love. About six 
have enjoyed it before, and are now seeking 
it afresh, and the rest, who never enjoyed it, 
are thirsting for it more than gold or silver. 
We are all, too, united in one spirit. All in 
this little company are helpers of each other's 
joy. 

I love Mrs. R. much : she is indeed one of 
the excellent ones of the earth. I feel much 
for you respecting the affair at Birstal : may 
the Lord strengthen your hands, and in doing 
so, defend his own cause. Your warfare shall 
surely yet be glorious, though it be through 
briars, or thorns, or scorpions. The Lord 
still reigneth, and will defend his dear ser- 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. ■ 1 87 

vants. Surely he is purging his Zion, and 
will remove the chaff, and leave himself a pure 
and a peaceable remnant, whose motto shall 
be " Holiness to the Lord." 

The openness of my disposition has some- 
times brought me into inconveniences ; but 
with you I believe it will not, and therefore I 
speak freely. I am very unapt to suspect any 
person of guile, but experience tells me all 
are not to be trusted. I feel I need the con- 
tinual unction of the Holy One to teach me. 
O pray that this may be ever given to your 
ever affectionate, unworthy child in a precious 

JeSUS, H. A. ROGERS. 

Letter to Rev, J. Wesley. 

Cork, Jan. 24, 1788. 

My Dear and Honored Sir, — Never had 
one, so every way undeserving, so much rea- 
son to praise a God of love. Day after day 
— nay, every hour I breathe, he loadeth me 
with his multiplied mercies ; yea, they are 
more in number than the hairs of my head. 
If I did not love him with all my consecrated 
powers, and every moment offer up my little 
all ; if I were not resolved to embrace every 
opportunity to spend and be spent in service 



1 88 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

so divine, I should of all mortals be the most 
inexcusable : for O ! his love to me is bound- 
less ; — I prove it an ocean without a bottom 
or a shore. The sweet communion I have 
with Father, Son, and Spirit, is unspeakable ! 
and whatsoever I ask of God in faith, it is 
done. In God I live : in him I move : by him 
I act and speak ; and it is in him alone I enjoy- 
all my mercies. 

Since I wrote last we have fresh cause for 
praise. The Lord is doing wonders among 
us here. It seems very likely, at present, we 
shall see as great a work here as at Dublin. 
At the visitation of the classes this Christ- 
mas, we found the society increased from 
three hundred and ninety-seven members (the 
number it contained last conference) to five 
hundred and four, and the number of classes 
are increased from twenty-four to thirty ; and 
fifty-six souls have found peace with God 
since September last. The Christmas festi- 
val was a most blessed season. On Christ- 
mas morning at four o'clock, the preaching 
house was well filled, and God was truly 
present to bless ; — many were awakened and 
four justified at the watch-night on New 
Year's eve. Several also found pardon at 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. 1 89 

the love-feast, and many witnessed a good 
confession : but the time for renewing our 
covenant exceeded all : fourteen souls were 
that day born of God : some at their classes, 
and the rest at that sweet solemn season of 
the covenant. The house was truly shaken 
(I mean every soul therein) by the power of 
God. I believe none present, preachers or 
people, will ever forget it. I trust I never shall. 
It was none other than the antechamber of 
glory to my soul — the house of God, the gate 
of heaven. O how was I filled with his pres- 
ence ! how did I bask in the beams of his 
love ! how was I made to feel his immeasur- 
able fulness all my own, through covenant 
blood divine ! Several were perfected in love, 
and several backsliders restored. Since this, 
between thirty and forty have joined the 
society; several of whom date their deep 
awakenings from the covenant night. Mr. 
Rogers saw it expedient, on that occasion, to 
give notes of admittance to some who were 
halting between two opinions ; and most of 
them were then, and are now, determined to 
be the Lord's. 

My class being now divided, I meet twenty 
on Tuesday, and eighteen on Friday. My 



I90 LIFE AND JOURNAL OF 

heart is knit to these precious souls ; and, 
blessed be God, we never meet in vain. The 
Lord is pleased to bless me in all my weak 
labors, and he knows I ascribe to him all the 
good done, and all the glory. I do lie at his 
feet, and am astonished at his condescending 
love to such a worm. Last Sunday evening, 
thanksgiving notes were sent by four, for a 
sense of pardon received last week ; and we 
hear of two more, who received the same 
blessing that day. Several of our dear friends, 
who know and love the Lord, have entered 
into a solemn covenant with him, and with 
each other, never to rest till they experience 
perfect love. One of these has since received 
the blessing, and seems in all things a new 
creature indeed. 

We have got another new place for preach- 
ing, in a very convenient and populous part 
of this city. Mr. R. preached there the first 
time a fortnight ago, and told the congrega- 
tion he would meet in a class as many as were 
determined to forsake their sins, and seek the 
kingdom of God with all their hearts. Four- 
teen offered themselves, and were admitted 
on trial ; and since then five more ; so that 
there is a new class meets there, of nineteen 



MRS. HESTER ANN ROGERS. I9I 

members. Great good is likely to be done, 
as most of the hearers that attend are stran- 
gers, who perhaps would never have heard 
elsewhere. We have now five preaching 
houses, at different parts and proper dis- 
tances ; and I believe we shall see a glorious 
harvest of precious souls. In all, since we 
came, seventy-seven are enabled to rejoice in 
a reconciled God, and many more seem just 
ready to step into the liberty of God's chil- 
dren. 

We hear good news respecting the word of 
God in Dublin, and in other parts of the 
kingdom. O may the Lord ride on in the 
glorious and triumphant chariot of gospel 
grace and salvation, till all be subdued ! My 
dear Mr. Rogers begs me to send his love to 
you, and joins me in daily intercessions at a 
throne of grace, that you may be filled with 
the fulness of every new covenant blessing. 
I am, my dear sir, your ever obliged and truly 
affectionate, though unworthy friend and ser- 
vant, H. A. ROGERS. 



BOSTON STEREOTYPE FOUNDRY, 
4 PEARL STREET. 



THE BOY PREACHER; 

OR, 

THE LIFE AND LABORS OF REV. THOMAS HARRISON. 

With sketches of the most remarkable Revivals in 



Fine Steel Portrait, - Price $1.00. 

" The remarkable labors of Mr. Harrison, the young revivalist, 
are fully described in this volume, and by the practiced pen of 
one who, himself, has been an evangelist for ten years, and 
whose publications on religious subjects are favorably known to 
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of the several religious awakenings with which Mr. Harrison 
has been connected, will undoubtedly make no little demand for 
this book. A portrait of Mr. Harrison accompanies the 
volume." 



LIFE, JOURNAL, AND SPIRITUAL LETTERS 

OF 

MRS. HESTER AO ROGERS. 

Condensed and combined. Price 50 cents. 

This deeply spiritual book will greatly help all who are 
panting for heart purity, and all who are seeking to be estab- 
lished in the doctrine and experience of entire sanctification. 



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